bryan j brown Funny Status Messages

   Sometimes I feel like I understand it all...And then sometimes De Speaka No Englis

   I really am glad those Egypt people got they freedom....But let a Mo Fo hit me with a rock and wez gonna have some problems....

   Look slavery is and will alwayz be wrong..BUT...I think I'm starting too understand white folks better cuz doing ur own laundry does kinda suck too

   Man with the Oil Spills and now the Nuclear Meltdowns we are gonna blow up this planet one day...I'm thinking bout packin my sh^t and moving to another planet..Which planet did the 3 boobs lady live on in the movie "Total Recall"??

   You know in the future its gonna be pretty common too say, "So grandma how many tattoos do you have?"

   Love how yall ladies enjoy that show "Snapped" stories about women who go crazy on their men..So I decided I'm gonna create a show for men its gonna be called "She Just Wouldn't Shut-the-f*ck-Up

   You know right about now cyphing gas outta folks cars really dont sound that crazy too me

   I dont watch porn on purpose...Its alwayz an accident cuz those movie titles just be trickin me all the time..."The Fantastic Foursome"..."Miracle on 69th Street"..."Glad-he-ate-her"..."Womb Raider" and my personal fav "Riding Miss Daisy"

   You had me at Rice Krispies Treats

   Satisfied isnt her telling you how great you were afterwards....Satisfied is her being unable too speak afterwards...I Do Work Son!!

   Ladies just cuz he locks his phone when he leaves the room doesn't mean hes cheatin...Now if he locks his phone...then takes the battery out...then moves the bookshelf which leads to an vault that he puts his phone in...Then ok maybe hes cheating

   If I was invisible I would be the most Boobie feelinest..Bank robbinest...person this side of the mississippi....Nite yall

   ‎"I didn't choose the thug life, the thug life chose me." Mother Teresa

   Doing the Jerk....its a dance...To be honest I could jerk it all day...And I dont ever see myself gettin tired doin it...And its a good workout too..I mean my arm is already gettin tired...And I only been jerking for a couple of mins now..I love dancing

   So if Justin Bieber has his own cologne...I def think its about time I came up with one of my own..Not sure what too call it tho..They say you should name it after things you like..So I am really leaning toward naming it "Ode to BoobiesVajayjayNinjaFight"

   Love is never wrong...Especially when that love is between two young carefree ladies who have wandering hands and a deep curiosity for experimentation...Yea that's some real love :)

   I miss the bottle rocket wars we use to have as a kid...Oh and too my boy "One Eyed Willy" thank you for taking one for the team all those years ago...What you lack in depth perception you make up with heart...

   Can yall imagine what Thanksgiving is going to be like in the Anthony home this year...AWKWARD!!

   Wait a min..she aint had a job in 2 years..And she had 10 lawyers?? Public Defender my ass...I guess its a good thing she wasnt a black girl named Peaches..Cuz she would have been Sh*t out of Luck...

   Now I heard women have like a sixth sense to tell what a guy is thinking about..And I wanna see if its true...So what am I thinking abou tright now??...(. )( .)...Give up??