Sully Funny Status Messages

   The White House was saddened by the passing of Dr. Jack Kevorkian, whom it planned to name its first chairman of the ObamaCare Death Panel.

   Anthony Weiner: I shouldn't tweet this pic. I'm married. Anthony's weiner: C'mon, do it. Who's gonna know.....

   I think Weiner's next press conference should be in a Brett Favre jersey....

   OMG!!! Anthony Weiner's wife is pregnant. Talk about a weiner working overtime....

   The only thing that could make this Weiner story more perfect is if it turns out to be Arnold Schwarzenegger's baby....

   Hard to believe there's another little Weiner on the way I'm thinking "Oscar Meyer" has a certain schwing to it.......

   Palin emails show's that she hadn't had a vacation in 5 years. Heck, the Obama's can't go 5 weeks without a vacation.......

   Apple is coming out with a new phone. It's called the Lebron james edition. It's silent and has no rings

   I'm praying Weiner gets his blood flowing and comes back bigger and harder than ever after all this.......

   Weiner's press conference was long and hard, but he finally whipped out his resignation after beating around the bush for a few minutes, effectively penetrating the crux of the situation and bringing the story to an explosive climax...

   For all of you Dads out there who went out for milk, and actually came back home -- HAPPY FATHER'S DAY......

   RIP Ryan Dunn. I'd like to think you entered the afterlife being slingshot in a wheelbarrow.

   Obama's speech tonight: Me me me me I I I I me I me I me me me I my my me me I I my me. Oh, and I........

   The only people happier than NY gays tonight are NY divorce lawyers..........

   BREAKING: Reality TV star Rod Blagojevich to move from NBC's 'Celebrity Apprentice' to MSNBC's 'Lockdown'.........

   I hope Casey Anthony's punishment involves cleaning the children's ball pit at McDonald's......

   I think Nancy Grace is the first woman to ever experience blue balls....

   I think Casey Anthony should be the new baby sitter for all the jurors' kids..

   Facebook Skype: now married people can cheat via Skype while watering their crops on FarmVille.

   Game Day...Here's to hoping USA wins the world cup, and a Hope Solo flash ; )