@OMFG_Rel8able Funny Status Messages

   Guilty people answer questions with a question

   "Are you as bored as I am?" Read that backwards, it still makes sense.

   Spongebob: hey can I talk with you for a second? Squidward: I dont know thats a pretty long time

   You can't be ugly and play hard to get. It just doesn't work that way. You're already hard to want..." -Peter Griffin

   That depressing moment when your parents don't appreciate the hilarious child they have been blessed with :P

   Lost your pen = no pen. No pen = no notes. No notes = no study. No study = fail. Fail = no diploma. So NEVER, EVER lose your pen

   "Don't Be Smart With Me!".... Okay Mom,.... i'll just be dumb. Sounds great

   i try not to act suspicious when passing police even though I'm innocent O.o

   What's on the board: 2•54/57(7+5/8)²•ab-c³ What teacher sees: 2+2=4 What you see: すきうせちし what you remember: __________

   Dear children, When you look under your bed, what exactly are you planning to do when you find me? Sincerely, The Monster.

   Me? Stalk? Nah, I just observe... behind a tree... at night..in the rain

   Well, I'd like to help… but not as much as I'd like not to

   Ambulances & Fire Trucks would be more effective if they played "Move B*ich Get Out The Way" by Ludacris instead of a siren!

   Spongebob: "Can you hear me?" Patrick: "No, It's too dark."

   What I expect to see when I pull back the shower curtain: 99% Murderer waiting to kill me. 1% Empty shower

   Teacher: "Why are you late? Student: "I'm late?" Teacher: "You just missed an entire period" Student: "Are you telling me I'm pregnant?"

   I can't decide whether The Nightmare Before Christmas is a Halloween movie or a Christmas movie.

   Teacher: "I am beautiful, which tense is this?" Me: "Obviously the past...”

   !̸̶͚͖͖̩̻̩̗͍̮̙̈͊͛̈͒̍̐ͣͩ̋ͨ̓̊̌̈̊́̚͝͠ͅ ̷̧̢̛͖̤̟̺̫̗͚̗͖ͪ̏̔̔̒́ͥ̓ͫ̀ͤ̇ͥ͝ ̡̊͛̇ ͫ̉ͦ̊̀̔ͧͮ͆̽ͦͩ͋̌͗̚̚҉̵͖̟͙̮͈̼̹̞͝ͅis ...Thats right I virtually cracked your screen ;P

   Don't make decisions when your angry or horny =P