anonymous Funny Status Messages

   chopping wood for the electric fireplace

   allowed to talk about fight club

   wondering when will he ever learn the answer to lifes problems arent at the bottom of a bottle, theyre on facebook!!!!!

   not FDA approved yet

   may contain nuts.

   amazed at the alarming drop-out rate of sky diving classes

   doesn't make mistakes, she dates them

   if nothing goes right.... go left!

   compulsively obsessed with OCD

   My Love Life is currently like NCAA mens Basketball, Its down to the FINAL FOUR! But My Wife has the homecourt Advantage!

   trying to wipe with plastic wrap.

   now available with a bonus DVD; containing deleted scenes and 2 theatrical trailers

   a serial status changer....

   has found her favorite machine at the gym it's the vending machine!

   would give her right arm to be ambidextrous

   ROTFLMAOASTC

   taking the "What color are you?" quiz and the result is: Who gives a Toss!!!!

   has learned a lot from dogs: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down (I've really only applied the last to my life, however)

   says, "If you want something in life, you have to work hard for it... Now shut up! They're about to announce the winning lottery numbers!"

   just plain lucky *