love Funny Status Messages

   I just want to suffocate, sorry I mean love you.

   love is out there, kinda like the zodiac killer is still out there too, so good luck.

   Teacher: Johnny,Use the word HARASSMENT in a Sentence..... Johnny: I was in Love with a girl and...Her-ass-meant a lot to me

   Before you fall in Love with a girl with sparkling eyes. Make sure It's not the sun shining through the back of her head

   She said "My love life is complicated." I said "No, nuclear physics is complicated. You're just a slut."

   You wake up from a coma only to realize everyone you love has abandoned you because they went through your phone while you were out.

   i have a man flu. I had a good run, I think this is the end for me. Tell my family I love them.

   Dogs love you even if you’re ugly.

   Things to do.. #1 dig a hole #2 name it love #3 watch people fall in love

   Cheating your wife doesn't mean that you don't love her...it's like hiring a taxi when you have your own car at home...it saves tires and longer lasting beauty and reduces mileage...Send this to your wife and let me know which hospital you are in..

   I love your enthusiasm, so I’m going to loosen your restraints.

   George Lucas is going to remake a Country & Western version of Star Wars. The theme song will be called "Looking for Love in Alderaan Places."

   Dear Maw & Paw. I've been captured by the blue wave. They actually fed me, clothed me, got me medical attention, and teaching me to read. Total monsters.....Love, your son, Billy Bob.

   Calm her down. Women love to be calmed down.

   Dating in your 20s: I love you so much. Let's get married! 30s: We get along pretty well. We should live together? 40s: I guess you can stay the night but don't touch my damn stuff.

   I love that "take out" means food, dating, and murder.

   I'm attending the next Trump rally because I love puppet shows.

   I love you more then a click of your like buttons.

   Women fall in love by what they hear. Men fall in love with what they see. That's why women wear makeup and men lie.

   Come on people now Smile on your brother Everybody get together Try to love one another Right now