chronic Iam Funny Status Messages

   dont be afraid of the dark, be afraid of whats in the dark....

   I stoped stabing people in the back years ago... now I stab them right in the face...

   Your sick, twisted, and rotten to the core!!!!! I like that in a person

   "This dog,is dog,a dog,good dog,way dog,to dog,keep dog,an dog,idiot dog,busy dog,for dog,20 dog,seconds dog," Now read without the word (dog)

   The worst thing about drugs is running out...

   Why get married and make one woman miserable when I can stay single and make thousands miserable?

   when I was born, they asked me if I wanted a long memory or a long penis.. I FORGET MY RESPONSE

   I believe theirs more than one way to skin a cat!!! but the cat wont like any one of them

   has a big clock

   CHAOS, PANIC & DISORDER... MY WORK HERE IS DONE...

   I want 2 die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather!! Not screaming in terror like his passengers!:)

   i use to have a coke problem........ now its just pepsi

   How can you tell a woman is having a bad day?? she has a tampon behind her ear and cant find her cigarette

   "This dog,is dog,a dog,good dog,way dog,to dog,keep dog,an dog,idiot dog,busy dog,for dog,20 dog,seconds dog," Now read without the word (dog)

   How did they know kurt cobain had dandruff... they found his head and shoulders on the floor;)

   not all women are annoying,,, some are dead

   If I flip this coin, what are my chances of getting head

   Michael jackson hasnt been this stiff since Mucully Culkin spent the night at Neverland ranch..

   a man walks up to his wife with a sheep under his arm, and says.. this is the pig I sleep with when you have a headach... confused, the wife says... thats not a pig under your arm?? I wasnt talking to u, replys the man

   Drugs have taught an entire generation of canadian kids the metric system!