@OMFG_Rel8able Funny Status Messages

   Lets run away together ... LOL, jk I have asthma!

   Announcing that you need to pee just because it feels necessary.

   I hate when I shout the wrong answer out in class with confidence

   "Is there gonna be food?" "Yup!" "Ok I'm on my way"

   My mom said to me "Guess whose washing the dishes tonight?!"...I Soulja boyd her & said "YOUUUUUUUUUU!"

   When I see your face, there's nothing that I would change. LOL JK, I'd change the direction I'm walking in.

   In bed it's 6am, you close your eyes for 5 minutes, its 7:45. At school it's 11:30, you close your eyes for 5 minutes, it's 11:30

   When Someone Asks For Candy That I'm Eating, I Give Them The Flavor I Don't Like

   The Feeling You Get When You're Paying For Something And Can't Find Your Money...

   When People Say, "When I Was Little I..." And I'm Just Sitting There Awkwardly Like, "I Still Do That"....

   #iwasntthatDrunk "Dude, you made your girlfriend a sandwich!"

   Dear Millionaires, if you don't have a bookshelf that spins into another room, give me your money because you're spending it wrong.

   While someone is speaking to me, 80% of my inner dialogue is just wondering if my face looks interested

   "OMG your fake tan looks so good!" LOL JK, it looks like you got raped by an orange

   "Hey, what's up?" "Gas prices." "You know what I mean, like.. What's crackin'?" "Nutshells." "Really? Fine. What's poppin'?" "Corn."

   If I am ever in the middle of a shooting, I will just lay on the floor and act like someone already killed me.

   Wondering if your adopted because your the only sexy one in the family.

   Guy: I love u. Girl: Aww really? Boy: Yep, Its my favorite vowel.

   My life will not be complete until I've walked away from an explosion in slow motion

   I'm not shy, I'm holding back my awesomeness, so I don't intimidate you ;P