Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 139 of 6384
“We just want to be treated like normal people,” says the Drag Queen twerking in front of a bunch of toddlers.
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06-11-2022 01:42
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Teacher: “And, that concludes our lesson on the Bill of Rights, any questions?” Student: So, like, none of that counts if I’m scared, right?
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06-11-2022 01:40
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Native Indians: “Turn in your firearms, they will protect you.”
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06-11-2022 01:40
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I went to a job interview the other day , Lady said She had 3 openings, I said I know .. still waiting for the call.
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06-10-2022 16:14
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Was up all night again trying to figure out how I would describe Yahtzee to a deaf person without using the jerk-off motion.
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06-10-2022 10:55
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Life isn’t supposed to be easy, it’s a fight, a test.
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06-10-2022 04:20
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Of course God knows about the bad things that happen. But, unlike lefticles, he has to be invited to intervene in your life.
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06-10-2022 04:05
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Studies show that cats understand human commands, but don’t care to follow them.
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06-10-2022 01:44
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Guy 1: How do you like my secret fishing spot? Guy 2: It’s really cool, not even the fish know about it.
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06-10-2022 01:44
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How to prepare tofu. Step one: throw it in the trash. Step two: grill some meat.
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06-10-2022 01:43
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Careful creampuff, I drink coffee stronger than your feelings.
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06-10-2022 01:42
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If liar’s pants really did catch on fire, watching the news would be a lot more interesting.
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06-10-2022 01:41
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I’m old school, I still believe in respect.
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06-10-2022 01:41
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Cain killed Abel with a rock, God blamed Cain, not the rock.
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06-10-2022 01:41
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If you ground up everyone in the world, it would create a meatball the size of Central Park.
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06-10-2022 01:40
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I should be ashamed of my behavior, but to be clear, I am not.
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06-10-2022 01:40
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How many of you are 12 years old and playing with your mother’s phone while she’s asleep?
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06-10-2022 01:39
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Just got a booty call from life, apparently it still wants to keep screwing me.
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06-09-2022 23:28
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LGBTQ=Lets Get Biden To Quit !
Orion's Belt is a huge waist of space. OK, bad joke. Only three stars.
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06-09-2022 20:19
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