Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 13 of 6374
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Every drop of water on earth has been through multiple kidneys at this point.
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Marriage tip: Every once in a while, call your wife by one of your ex girlfriend's names. This will help her realize that she is not the only woman on the docket and that you're a really good catch!
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Hoes be looking for guys with the same initials as there x.
So they don't have to edit they tattoos .
Lol
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Transginger.
I don't have red hair,
But I'll think could rock it.
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I smell pizza.
I think I'm having a Little Seizure
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Working 5 days a week just to be free for 48hrs just doesn't sit right with me.
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Transgender
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01-23-2024 00:01
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Why is there enough asphalt for speed bumps but not enough to fill potholes?
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my name jeff
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01-21-2024 21:23
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a monkey
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01-21-2024 21:23
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The biggest mistake people make in a relationship is giving their heart to someone who needs a brain.
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The relationship between a husband and wife is psychological. One is psycho and the other is logical.
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It's not the stab in the back that hurts you. It's when you turn turn around and see who's holding the knife.
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01-19-2024 06:33
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Waking up is never easy but I just have to remember that the world can't revolve around me unless I get out of bed.
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Gen X. Living in the shadows of Baby Boomers, yet not as identifiable as Millennials. A generation of nothingness whose sole contribution to society is giving birth to Gen Z. Those annoying imbeciles.
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01-17-2024 21:31 by Fike
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I rolled over too fast in bed and sprained my fat roll !
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01-16-2024 22:22
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My friend is single and middle-aged. I think she might be Catholic. Sorry, I mean cat-holic.
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01-16-2024 15:50 by Eddy
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I've got people who love me because I'm me. I've got people who hate me for the same reason!
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Whoppers all around for Martin Burger King Day.
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01-15-2024 18:06
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There are starving kids in Africa. IHOP has a “Kids Eat Free” promotion. Just build an IHOP in Africa. Problem solved
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01-15-2024 13:42
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