Tjshome.com
Funny Status Messages
Submit Status
TJ's Blog
Image Filters
Contact US
Submit a Status Message
Joser Funny Status Messages
Sort:
Recent
|
Oldest
|
Rating
Search Messages:
[
Clear
]
«Prev
«1
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
Next»
Most Recent
Search results for status messages containing 'Joser'
:
View All Messages
Page: 15 of 39
A leopard can't change its spots, unless it has Photoshop.
21
5
←Rate |
06-15-2010 17:31 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
Still working on an electromagnetic pulsating device to disable cell phones in theaters. For now, please continue making do with neckpunches.
21
5
←Rate |
06-16-2010 17:52 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
That thing people do with their mouth when they're using their tongue to get food out of their teeth, I bet there's porn for that.
21
5
←Rate |
06-24-2010 23:21 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
An Unemployment Registry would make a lot more sense than a Wedding Registry.
25
6
←Rate |
05-03-2010 17:29 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
What do you mean I can't order a Whopper with bacon in between 2 chicken patties wrapped in a burrito? I thought this was Have It Your Way?
29
7
←Rate |
04-29-2010 13:08 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
LIFE; It's one damned thing after another
29
7
←Rate |
06-02-2010 22:58 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
Life would be easier if Kleenex just made shirt sleeves.
29
7
←Rate |
06-03-2010 13:24 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
Bad news: pulled a muscle. Good news: implied presence of muscle.
29
7
←Rate |
07-11-2010 11:50 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
my 7 year old is all "F*ck homework!" and I'm all "I didn't adopt an Asian baby for you to suck at school!"
66
16
←Rate |
05-03-2010 17:29 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
Monday Morning just logged me out due to inactivity...
33
8
←Rate |
05-03-2010 17:31 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
Let this be known as my Living Will. I do not wish to be cremated. If the Zombie Apocalypse happens I would like to be a part of it.
33
8
←Rate |
06-14-2010 19:13 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
I don't take compliments well. Or criticism. You know what, just don't talk to me.
37
9
←Rate |
07-08-2010 18:56 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
Filing a BP Damage Claims. Due to the Gulf disaster, instead of a vacation at the beach, we're going to visit my in-laws...
32
8
←Rate |
07-14-2010 17:18 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
Look, all we have to do is put little pieces of paper with mystical-sounding gibberish on them inside these cookies -- we'll make a fortune!
32
8
←Rate |
06-16-2010 18:16 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
surviving this massive amount of "family time" by pretending they are mental patients and I'm their case manager.
28
7
←Rate |
06-11-2010 19:31 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
I'm about to conquer a mountain of BBQ meat so epic that my utensils are a beach towel, safety goggles, and police tape.
24
6
←Rate |
05-17-2010 09:49 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
for every action there will be someone to have a complete overreaction.
24
6
←Rate |
07-06-2010 17:24 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
How can anybody call themselves a Life Coach when they haven't even played a whole game yet?
20
5
←Rate |
04-19-2010 22:10 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
You know who sucks Aggressive drivers. And cowardly drivers. And slow drivers. And drivers who are not me.
16
4
←Rate |
07-12-2010 11:36 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
thinks rock is dead. And paper killed it!
16
4
←Rate |
04-22-2010 19:46 by
Joser
Comments (
0
)
«Prev
«1
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
Next»
Most Recent
[Search Results] [
View All Messages
]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:
X says
X is
X was
X has
X
...
characters left
Read the Rules
Site Links
Home
Funny Status Messages
Status Message Generator
TJ's Blog
About Tjshome
Contact Us
Privacy
© 1999 - 2021 Tjshome.com