ff1241 Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I like animals more than people. Mind you I also kill, skin, butcher, and eat animals.
←Rate | 08-02-2013 03:49 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Heritage For The Blind wants me to donate my old car to them. FUNK THAT! We have enought people that can't drive that can see why the hell would I want a blind person driving.
←Rate | 06-11-2013 20:03 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm not much of a Target person...just seems hypocritical that you can't buy guns, ammo or....targets at a place called Target!!
←Rate | 05-28-2013 02:53 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have a blind date and I keep having people tell me to just be myself. Are you kidding me? Have you read my FB post?
←Rate | 10-23-2012 02:43 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today is one of the few days of the year I can pretend to be a Kardashian (do nothing and get paid for it).
←Rate | 09-03-2012 18:27 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Im worried, about that one cute sweet innocent girl who keeps liking my fb post.
←Rate | 08-29-2012 03:45 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm really looking forward to the hurricane coverage to see which news reporter falls flat on their face from the wind...Ahhh, watching them fall never gets old!
←Rate | 08-25-2012 18:57 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know that you work too much when you count hours off and not days off.
←Rate | 08-23-2012 21:59 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I believe in evolution by natural selection. But I have one big problem with it. Its not fast enough and there are too many safeguards in place not to let nature do its thing.
←Rate | 08-14-2012 20:34 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its almost Barf day. That day you get one more year older want want to barf but can't so you induce yourself with booz until you do.
←Rate | 07-11-2012 16:42 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women want to be equal to men in every aspect except dating. You all want the same positions in the rest of the world but still expect to be wined and dined. How about steaks and bjs for the guys.
←Rate | 07-05-2012 04:23 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If its Friday night and she lifts up her skirt and her panties say Saturday. She is staying the night.
←Rate | 07-03-2012 22:49 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm glad people have the confidence to wear revealing clothing but sometimes your confidence is NOT very pleasant to look at.
←Rate | 06-28-2012 19:41 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Getting into an argument with a stupid people is something you will never win at even when you do. Like tic-tac-toe or global thermonuclear war.
←Rate | 06-28-2012 19:40 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A camp fire is alot like masterbation. As long as you have wood you can keep yourself entertained. But when its gone the fun is over.
←Rate | 05-30-2012 16:33 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I need a bigger grill. And I'm not talking about the gold bubba teeth.
←Rate | 05-28-2012 16:36 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Only dead fish go with the flow.
←Rate | 04-30-2012 14:34 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Head banging to rock music doesn't have the same effect when your bald. Ask me how I know this.
←Rate | 04-21-2012 20:10 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Being dyslexic and online dating can be a big problem. My last date I thought it said nympho maniac. Turns out she was a necro'philic.
←Rate | 04-15-2012 21:04 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ever been so tired at work that people thought you were drunk? I hope so because thats the only excuse I have for being drunk at work.
←Rate | 04-10-2012 20:25 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


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