Joser Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon The new version of Pac-Man was so awesome, it came with a search engine built into it... Can we have it back...?
←Rate | 05-25-2010 18:29 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon I never pick up the house phone....But run a mile for the Cell Phone.
←Rate | 05-25-2010 18:26 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon With great power comes a great electric bill...
←Rate | 05-25-2010 18:25 by Joser Comments (2)  


   messageicon Can you call the Geek Squad if you just want to give someone a wedgie?
←Rate | 05-25-2010 18:24 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm totally over LOST. I don't even care anymore. I don't miss it at all. Do you want to drive by LOST's house and see if it's home?
←Rate | 05-25-2010 18:23 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon Disinfecting my kitchen right now with the glass of vodka and Red Bull that I just spilled all over the countertop.
←Rate | 05-25-2010 18:22 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon It wasn't until Rick gazed upon a photo on her facebook after 4 kids, and 80 pounds that he finally stopped wishing he had Jessie's girl.
←Rate | 05-25-2010 18:21 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon As a man, it scares the hell out of me that North Korea has a missile called the "no dong."
←Rate | 05-25-2010 18:21 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think you misunderstood me. I said "go phuck yourself" with a PH. So, that makes it cool and not remotely offensive... Phucktard.
←Rate | 05-25-2010 18:20 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon I feel sorry for our ancestors who used to have to wait days or weeks to hear from friends that they were laughing out loud.
←Rate | 05-25-2010 18:19 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think Eminem should become a dentist just so he can say "snap back to reality, oh there goes a cavity."
←Rate | 05-25-2010 18:18 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon Never end a sentence with a preposition. Incorrect: Thongs crack me up. Correct: Thongs up me crack.
←Rate | 05-25-2010 18:18 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon me and procrastinating have this love hate relationship going on.... but I'll do it later...
←Rate | 05-24-2010 17:40 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon just drove passed a Budweiser Delivery truck wrecked on the side of the freeway, oh the humanity... I'd like a moment of silence please...
←Rate | 05-24-2010 11:33 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't worry about people from your past, There's a reason why they didn't make it to your future.
←Rate | 05-24-2010 11:09 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon My bank is the worst. They're charging me money for not having enough money in my account. Apparently, I can't even afford to be broke.
←Rate | 05-24-2010 11:06 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon You call it poor parenting, I call it raising free range children.
←Rate | 05-24-2010 11:06 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon The fastest way to being happy is to make other people happy. You go first.
←Rate | 05-23-2010 22:16 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon They wouldn't have to ban texting while driving if they would just legalize driving through red lights...
←Rate | 05-23-2010 22:16 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll tell ya, there's nothing better than a cold beer(s) after a long hard day of laying on the couch...
←Rate | 05-23-2010 22:15 by Joser Comments (0)  




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