Nick Funny Status Messages
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and Premature Ejaculation are now friends...
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08-04-2010 12:26 by Nick
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Did anyone ever think that Charlie Brown could have used some counseling? I mean seriously, the kid was bullied, made fun of, and was bald by the time he was ten!
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10-30-2010 05:38 by nick
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just realized that Superman was an illegal immigrant
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11-24-2010 12:24 by nick
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face! Duh!
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12-20-2010 17:37 by nick
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Hey, I don't like cocaine... I just like the way it smells.
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09-22-2011 13:48 by nick
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and asks the bartender, "how much for a drink?" A neutrino walks into a bar
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09-26-2011 20:13 by nick
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Going to a strip club when your married is like going to mercedes dealership and not being able to to take one home.
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10-02-2011 15:23 by Nick
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Maybe if these Wall Street protesters had put as much effort into making something out of themselves as they do protesting. They would be working on Wall Street.
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10-07-2011 08:54 by Nick
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my mom once said something that really stuck with me. She said, Nick, you're a big disappointment,' and God bless her soul, she was really onto something..
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10-16-2011 05:40 by Nick
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Brigands demand your money or your life; women require both.
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10-16-2011 05:42 by Nick
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I've always wanted to place a personal ad no one would answer: "Elderly, depressed, accident-prone junkie, likes Canadian food and Welsh music, seeking rich, well-built, oversexed, female deaf mute in her late teens. Must be nonsmoker."
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10-16-2011 15:53 by Nick
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I like, likeing the quotes everybody hates:)
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10-21-2011 20:56 by nick
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God may love you...but everyone else thinks you suck! I was kidding..,.God thinks you suck also.
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12-14-2011 18:24 by Nick
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lol @ "If he pauses his game to text you back, marry him".. We never pause it, we're just waiting to respawn.
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12-27-2011 00:28 by Nick
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"And the flowers are still standing!"
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01-15-2012 11:32 by Nick
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cant have an openly religious football player in the NFL, that would be bad. it needs more accused murderers, rapists and morons who shoot themselves in the leg.
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01-15-2012 23:52 by Nick
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a good driver discount, a good student discount. what about a watching an anoying lizard in a stupid comercial discount?
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01-15-2012 23:55 by Nick
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What's the difference between oral sex and anal sex? Oral sex makes your day and anal sex makes your hole weak...
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03-03-2012 09:01 by nick
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What if Tupac is alive and we are all holograms?
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04-20-2012 14:14 by nick
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So, Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar... and doesn't.
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07-24-2012 08:32 by Nick
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