BOB Funny Status Messages

   believes that if you tell your boss what you really think of him, the truth will set you free.

   Watching a good movie but doesn't know why people put sex on DVDs

   Science ignores any facts that disprove evolution. Nothing scientific about that!

   Ahh Easter Sunday, when catholics actually go to church then pretend all year they are religious..

   Ahh the Sunday after Easter... Catholics forgot where church was already, see you at Christmas!

   Bin Laden's wife has just changed her FB staus to single

   It's so hot I just saw two trees fighting over a dog

   about to give $$$ to a homeless peddler....until his I-Phone went off.

   nothings more horrifying than when you do an early flush and then start to feel wetness.

   BREAKING NEWS: In a new Marital Sex Survey, women have reportedly faked all their answers ....

   doubling his calorie intake to gain weight, and all this is doing is making me drop quatros instead of dueces.

   it looks like the word "horseplay" has taken on a whole new meaning and has been essentialy ruined for life...thanks Sandscumsky

   ready for a football, family, food, and farts...Happy Thanksgiving!

   Dear Target: please fire your ad agency. That crazy blonde lady in red is annoying and will probably bring your sales way down. Call an audible and hire Walmart's

   multi-directional urinating and it all landed safely at sea....gonna be a good day!

   If you are one, 'stop being a procrastinator' should take precedence over all other resolutions. Starting tomorrow.

   thank you Tom Brady for showing the world that you have way more GOD given talent than Tebow!

   Kim Kardashian Wants To Experience Tebow Time?!?! No, Kimmy, Tebow cannot restore your virginity.

   if you change your status to "in a relationship", it must last longer than a Kim Kardashian marriage.

   Obama should use enhanced interrogation techniques on Newt to find out where the secret "bring the price of gas down to $2.50/gallon" lever is.