XX-FOXY Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon Some girls don't like to walk in the rain because it puts their face back to the default factory settings...
←Rate | 04-06-2019 06:51 by xx-foxy Comments (0)  

   messageicon On Sunday France plays Croatia... Their defense will try to last 90 minutes and beat their World War II record...
←Rate | 07-12-2018 20:22 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon Android > BlackBerry > Nokia > Fax > Landline phone > 2 cans and a string > Message in a bottle > Pigeon with a note taped to it > iPhone with iOS 11
←Rate | 01-25-2018 13:55 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon Q: How do you play the ISIS bingo? A: B-52...F-16...B-1...
←Rate | 01-13-2018 22:47 by XX-FOXY Comments (1)  

   messageicon You know it was a rough night when your iPhone X doesn't recognize your face in the morning...
←Rate | 11-25-2017 09:02 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon Ambition is the path to success. Persistence is the vehicle you arrive in...
←Rate | 10-12-2017 09:22 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon Other than insecurity, hatred & racism, sexism & discrimination, greed, infidelity and sheer stupidity most of the human race is pretty much perfect...
←Rate | 09-23-2017 09:46 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon I hope someday I will be able to afford an iPhone X... Like the girl in front of me paying for her groceries with food stamps...
←Rate | 09-23-2017 09:42 by XX-FOXY Comments (1)  

   messageicon If I were a cannibal I'd only eat vegetarians, just for the irony...
←Rate | 09-18-2017 21:38 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon America: the only country in the world where not wearing a seat-belt carries a bigger penalty then letting hackers steal 143 million citizens social security numbers, bank info, drivers licenses and credit cards...
←Rate | 09-16-2017 09:45 by XX-FOXY Comments (2)  

   messageicon The worst sanction on Vladimer Putin: We send Justin Bieber to Russia!
←Rate | 08-04-2017 00:42 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon Today I ask God for patience to deal with stupid people and courage to tolerate their ignorance, because Lord only knows if I ask for strength I might beat them to death...
←Rate | 07-30-2017 12:24 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon If you see an animal stuck in a trap, free them! If you see a child crying, comfort them! If you see Justin Bieber crossing the street, HIT THE GAS!!!
←Rate | 07-14-2017 06:57 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon When a man says he'll do anything for a woman, he means slaying dragons, killing zombies and rescuing her from castle towers. IT DOES NOT MEAN cleaning garage, fixing roof and cleaning out the basement!!!
←Rate | 07-09-2017 08:38 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon 30 years ago today, "Licensed to Ill" was the #1 Album...
←Rate | 03-08-2017 16:42 by XX-FOXY Comments (1)  

   messageicon NEWS UPDATE: Donald J. Trump has dropped Mexico, China and Iran from his enemies list and added the 9th Circuit Court and Nordstrom.
←Rate | 02-09-2017 23:31 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon No babe, don't send me the nude pictures. Send me a picture of your medicine cabinet. I'd like to know what kind of psycho I'm dealing with...
←Rate | 03-18-2016 06:18 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon Bikinis expose 90% of a woman's body, but men are so decent, polite and well-mannered that we only look at the remaining 10% that is covered..
←Rate | 03-18-2016 06:17 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon Hard to believe I once had a phone ATTACHED TO A WALL. It did not have Bluetooth, you could not take selfies on it or send any text messages... Even worse! When it rang I'd pick it up WITHOUT KNOWING WHO WAS CALLING. Amazing I'm still alive!
←Rate | 03-18-2016 06:13 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  

   messageicon My girl got naked and asked me to "Show her a good time." So I showed her Facebook pics of me with my friends the night before...
←Rate | 02-25-2016 17:51 by XX-FOXY Comments (0)  


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