Mom or Mother Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon The penalty for bigamy is having two mother in-laws.
←Rate | 02-05-2019 16:03 by Joker Comments (0)  

   messageicon In sept 1945 I wish "he" was shot into space instead of his mother being impregnated with him.
←Rate | 01-27-2019 14:07 Comments (0)  

   messageicon My mother inlaw standing in front of a mirror: "I feel fat and ugly." . Me to make her feel better: "Well at lease your eye sight is good."
←Rate | 01-24-2019 14:17 by Joker Comments (2)  

   messageicon My mother in-law is so ugly, even a boiling tea kettle won't give her a whistle.
←Rate | 01-14-2019 17:23 by Joker Comments (0)  

   messageicon My mother never saw the iorny in calling me a s.o.b.
←Rate | 01-03-2019 02:48 by Joker Comments (0)  

   messageicon Well, I guess we are going to see "The Nutcracker" on Saturday! My mother-in-law, not the play.......
←Rate | 12-15-2018 00:20 by JeffW Comments (0)  

   messageicon Why did Adam and Eve have the perfect marriage?..... Because neither one of them had a mother in-law.
←Rate | 10-15-2018 22:12 by Haha Comments (0)  

   messageicon using Just For Men on your mother in laws mustache at night wrong ? Asking for a friend ..
←Rate | 10-04-2018 22:08 Comments (0)  

   messageicon When my mother in-law said she wants to be creamated. I immediatley made her an appointment for next week.
←Rate | 09-14-2018 23:00 by Haha Comments (0)  

   messageicon I've noticed that the most attractive women always drive those cute little cars! Which reminds me...the mother-in-law's Panzer needs an oil change!!
←Rate | 08-09-2018 09:59 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Gave my boss a mother's day card. Because "he" is one of the top ten mothers on my list.
←Rate | 05-12-2018 00:34 by Jake Comments (0)  

   messageicon Another woman cause me to leave my wife. It was her mother.
←Rate | 04-24-2018 19:38 by Jake Comments (0)  

   messageicon Kid, “Did you feel that? Was that an earthquake?” Husband, “No it was just your mother coming down the stairs.” And that, folks, is how to end a marriage in 10 words or less.
←Rate | 04-20-2018 02:11 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Its still winter because Mother Nature saw all our summer bodies and decided we weren't ready yet.
←Rate | 04-17-2018 19:12 by @UncleBSolomon Comments (0)  

   messageicon Switching off my mother inlaw's life support machine was very difficult. I had to fight off a doctor, a nurse and two security guards. Beeeeeeeep
←Rate | 03-23-2018 22:33 by Jake Comments (0)  

   messageicon . My mother in-law is drowning, I've informed emergency services. Hope they get my letter in time to save her.
←Rate | 03-08-2018 01:25 by Jake Comments (0)  

   messageicon My mother taught me to never argue with strangers on the Internet. She said I must agree to meet them in real life, and then punch them in the face.
←Rate | 02-26-2018 13:27 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Two girls talking. 1st girl: I've been ask lots of times to get married. 2nd girl: Was it by the same guy? 1st girl: No, by my mother.
←Rate | 02-10-2018 17:29 by Jake Comments (0)  

   messageicon You know its sad when your mother is on facebook and guys younger than you are poking her
←Rate | 01-25-2018 03:14 Comments (0)  

   messageicon You'll never be the man your mother is.
←Rate | 01-04-2018 01:26 Comments (0)  


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