mc fazzerino Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Whenever I attend a wedding, to truly celebrate the anticipated short duration of the marriage, I throw Minute Rice.
←Rate | 10-09-2012 13:11 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Look..I'm not trying to be difficult...it actually comes easy to me.
←Rate | 10-11-2012 11:41 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon All these facebook game requests and not one from a hot chick for N@ked Twister.
←Rate | 10-18-2012 11:49 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon "How To Win Friends And Influence People On Facebook" Post pictures of dogs and cats.
←Rate | 10-19-2012 09:29 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lady GaGa just signed a deal with a major corporation to represent her new clothing line. Hillshire Farms.
←Rate | 10-25-2012 12:15 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Being single sucks. The only thing I get to do is whatever I want.
←Rate | 10-25-2012 14:23 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon I know some folks who could use a 12 step program. Where 11 of those steps should be to the edge of a cliff.
←Rate | 12-18-2012 09:09 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon A guy in a bar stands up and says, "All lawyers are a$$holes." Another guy stands up and says "Hey...I resent that..." The first guy says, "Why? Are you a lawyer?" The second guy says, "No. I'm an a$$hole."
←Rate | 12-18-2012 12:52 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon So I'm flying to England and the flight attendant asks me if I want dinner. I asked her what my choices were. She said, "Yes or no."
←Rate | 12-19-2012 11:26 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Spooning...the precursor to forking.
←Rate | 02-06-2013 09:12 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women: The prettiest flowers in God's garden.
←Rate | 02-25-2013 06:14 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (1)  


   messageicon High School Reunions: Trying to replicate that which was never so great to begin with.
←Rate | 02-25-2013 06:53 by Mc Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Um...Food Network? Um, could you have a program that shows folks how to make fried chicken, meat loaf, mashed potatoes and things like that? Some of us don't like Duck's A$$ in Radicchio and Lobster Nutsack Glaze.
←Rate | 03-02-2013 08:36 by MC Fazzerino Comments (2)  


   messageicon Know what? If they had Neosporin back in 1931, that nasty scar on Frankenstein's forehead would have been far less noticeable.
←Rate | 03-07-2013 05:53 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Romney or Obama....Romney or Obama. I'm just now getting the chance to vote. I LOVE living in Florida.
←Rate | 03-07-2013 19:14 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon We haven't lost an hour, we loaned it to the illusion we call "time". "Time" will pay us back in full at 2am on Sun., Nov 3. This is an interest free loan, and means there are no seconds, minutes, or hours assessed.
←Rate | 03-10-2013 15:00 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon Okay so, last Sunday we all lost an hour. This Sunday, we should all watch NASCAR and lose four.
←Rate | 03-15-2013 21:10 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon I went to the dentist for a cleaning. After he was done I told him my teeth were still yellow. He said I should wear a brown tie then no one would notice.
←Rate | 03-16-2013 17:35 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hold the NASCAR world record for the number of races never watched. Zero.
←Rate | 03-17-2013 20:25 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  


   messageicon If everyone has a crack in their a$$, why are so many still full of $hit?
←Rate | 03-18-2013 20:03 by MC Fazzerino Comments (0)  



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