YourFavOriteAhole Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon My dog once licked the crumbs out of my computer keyboard & earned an online college degree from Everest
←Rate | 06-17-2013 21:04 by YourFavOriteAhole Comments (0)  


   messageicon I really dont understand interventions. What's the point of being told I have a drinking problem by a room full of reasons why I drink too much in the first place.
←Rate | 06-17-2013 21:16 by YourFavOriteAhole Comments (0)  


   messageicon Given that you can be anything you want on the Internet... I really don't understand why so many women portray themselves as skeeO's
←Rate | 06-17-2013 21:33 by YourFavOriteAhole Comments (0)  


   messageicon Out of all the Socially Transmitted Diseases out there, I have Instagram is my favorite.
←Rate | 06-17-2013 22:00 by YourFavOriteAhole Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thank God for my mother being so horny 31 years ago or I could have just died a slow death in a sock.
←Rate | 06-17-2013 22:15 by YourFavOriteAhole Comments (0)  


   messageicon Someone accused me of stealing his status that I stole from someone else... awkward!
←Rate | 06-18-2013 22:05 by YourFavOriteAhole Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bet Jay Leno is amazing at putting on pillow cases & folding blankets.
←Rate | 06-18-2013 22:19 by YourFavOriteAhole Comments (0)  


   messageicon Someone should really tell cab drivers not to Stink & Drive.
←Rate | 06-18-2013 22:27 by YourFavOriteAhole Comments (0)  


   messageicon You get a dozen chances to make a first impression when you're dealing with a pothead.
←Rate | 06-19-2013 15:42 by YourFavOriteAhole Comments (0)  


   messageicon The reason why it's so hard to understand Rachel Jeantel at the Zimmerman trial is not because she's uneducated, it's because she has multiple necks. So it just takes a lil longer for her words to travel.
←Rate | 06-27-2013 12:32 by YourFavOriteAhole Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guys, putting the word “Swag” in your Bio is a good way of telling girls you didn't finish school & your job is selling crack on the corner.
←Rate | 06-28-2013 13:51 by YourFavOriteAhole Comments (0)  


   messageicon Paula Dean is currently at home watching the George Zimmerman trial in disgust.
←Rate | 06-28-2013 13:53 by YourFavOriteAhole Comments (0)  



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