The FRED Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I'm doing the KFC Bucket Challenge!
←Rate | 08-16-2014 00:33 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon Worrying is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do, but doesn't get you anywhere.
←Rate | 02-16-2010 19:55 by The FRED Comments (1)  


   messageicon I think the sudden stardom of Justin Bieber marks the beginning of the apocalypse.
←Rate | 04-10-2010 23:36 by The Fred Comments (0)  


   messageicon I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.
←Rate | 03-30-2010 23:56 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon **Warning** It turns out Farmville is a virus that will eat your life away. Side effects are all your friends hate you because of your tacky updates & you're getting fatter from sitting online all day playing. Delete it ASAP and stop being a Tool.
←Rate | 02-01-2010 20:04 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon I feel like I'm the best, but you're not going to get me to say that, cuz I'm modest.
←Rate | 03-24-2010 00:53 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks cocaine is a good way of telling you that you make too much money.
←Rate | 03-08-2010 20:07 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon Baldly going where no man has gone before…
←Rate | 02-01-2010 20:40 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's whiter outside than a Pat Boone concert!
←Rate | 02-05-2010 21:56 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon Opinions are like orgasms. Mine is more important and I don't give a f**k if you have one.
←Rate | 03-08-2010 20:15 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon For the Mean girl who cut me off, gave me the finger & rolled down your window just to call me A-hole. Next time you should think before you act. You were pulling into your Driveway. Now you have Egg on your face & your car & your house. =)
←Rate | 06-15-2010 01:17 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon became a fan of not becoming a fan of everything on facebook.
←Rate | 03-23-2010 19:23 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like fat girls, they need lovin' too. Unfortunately most Guys won't repost this.
←Rate | 04-18-2010 22:43 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
←Rate | 04-10-2010 21:34 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Mr. City Plow Guy, I'd like to actually go to work in the morning so for a change can you maybe not make another Giant Ice mound at the end of my Driveway? For an added bonus could you use some salt on my road instead of just flatting out the snow.
←Rate | 02-10-2010 23:58 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon Duct tape - $3.79, Shovel - $29.99, 50 lb. bag of lime - $14.99, Life without you - PRICELESS.
←Rate | 03-31-2010 00:02 by The Fred Comments (0)  


   messageicon If anyone needs me I'll be setting up a sniper pearch in Punxsutawney, Pa. This year that fat little groundhog will not make it back to the hole.
←Rate | 01-31-2010 23:39 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon The hardest part about moving forward is not looking back.
←Rate | 02-16-2010 19:51 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon Joe Paterno's doctors also said they wish they could have done more.
←Rate | 01-22-2012 12:37 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon Look down ur shirt and spell ATTIC.
←Rate | 04-19-2010 23:57 by The FRED Comments (0)  



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