Chuck Norris Sayings (beta)

Hey Yanks. Will you tell us all about that time you won Dubbya-Dubbya-Two all on your own or that Chuck Norris could have done something impossible? Because it's been at least a good five minutes since we heard one of those tales.

Submitted: 08-27-2011 18:40 Comments (0)

There was never a giraffe until Chuck Norris upper-cutted a zebra

Submitted: 12-30-2009 17:23 by bob@bob.com Comments (0)

"Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris deflected all three bullets with his beard. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement."

Submitted: 10-22-2010 14:29 by Michael Comments (0)

This status has been removed by Chuck Norris

Submitted: 11-12-2009 21:37 by @CGRIN2049 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris does not wear a condom because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris

Submitted: 01-06-2011 23:55 Comments (0)

"Google ""Where is Chuck Norris"" and click ""I'm feeling lucky""...You're welcome."

Submitted: 04-08-2010 16:16 by Brades Comments (2)

Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.

Submitted: 12-14-2011 11:00 Comments (0)

Wondering how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could Chuck Norris

Submitted: 08-08-2008 00:22 by Talon Comments (0)

"This is Chuck Norris, you guys need to stop talking about me, talk sh¡t get h¡t"

Submitted: 12-14-2011 12:33 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris created swine flu when he sneezed on a pig and it exploded

Submitted: 08-26-2009 14:31 by Green Lantern Comments (0)

Jet Li is the Chinese version of Chuck Norris

Submitted: 03-31-2011 00:14 by Mike Comments (1)

"Chuck Norris doesn't go to hell, Hell goes to Chuck Norris!!!"

Submitted: 06-07-2011 07:39 Comments (0)

"To the person who said Chuck Norris once flushed a condom.. later the ninja turtles were born,"" Chuck Norris doesn't wear a condom because there is no protection from Chuck Norris...Duh..."""

Submitted: 06-01-2011 10:54 Comments (0)

"Chuck Norris has actually been dead for the last 5 years, but the grim reaper is too scared to tell him"

Submitted: 12-15-2011 19:36 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris broke a vice trying to crack his knuckles.

Submitted: 04-05-2011 17:49 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris taught Al Bundy how to score 4 touchdowns in a high School Football Game

Submitted: 03-21-2011 14:55 by migasjoe Comments (0)

Chuck Norris came from future to protect Terminator

Submitted: 05-11-2011 06:24 Comments (0)

Brittney Griner is what happens when little girls drink Chuck Norris's sweat

Submitted: 03-26-2012 20:44 Comments (0)

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

Submitted: 11-09-2012 12:52 Comments (0)

"Chuck Norris's daughter lost her virginity, he got it back."

Submitted: 12-08-2011 00:08 by g0re Comments (0)