Chuck Norris Sayings (beta)

I can post a Chuck Norris post it got me 70 plus likes....I think someone is mad they didn't come up with it lol

Submitted: 12-13-2011 15:01 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris is what Willis was talking about

Submitted: 12-14-2011 01:13 Comments (0)

"When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion, one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the a$$, smokes a cigarette with Dennis Leary, and then roundhouse kicks them in the face. "

Submitted: 12-14-2011 01:14 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus’ birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.

Submitted: 12-14-2011 01:16 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris once kicked a baby elephant into puberty

Submitted: 12-14-2011 01:17 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris always has sex on the first date. Always.

Submitted: 12-14-2011 01:18 Comments (0)

"Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of “beard”. Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus’ obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible

Submitted: 12-14-2011 01:25 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris doesn't have AIDS but he gives it to people anyway.

Submitted: 12-14-2011 01:31 Comments (0)

OMG...Chuck Norris Again!! your Chuck Norris is 71 Years Old and Farts Dust...he sucks as an Actor...the only that was ever cool about him was he was once a body guard for ELVIS..but that was 40 yrs ago! he sucks ass and so do you his Disciples'...

Submitted: 12-14-2011 10:18 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.

Submitted: 12-14-2011 10:57 Comments (0)

"When Chuck Norris was born, the only person who cried was the doctor. Never slap Chuck Norris. "

Submitted: 12-14-2011 10:58 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.

Submitted: 12-14-2011 11:00 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle

Submitted: 12-14-2011 11:05 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.

Submitted: 12-14-2011 11:07 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.

Submitted: 12-14-2011 11:13 Comments (0)

Scientists have estimated that the energy given off during the Big Bang is roughly equal to 1CNRhK (Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick)

Submitted: 12-14-2011 11:16 Comments (0)

Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his mother's womb.

Submitted: 12-14-2011 11:21 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

Submitted: 12-14-2011 11:22 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris can blow a bubble with beef jerky!

Submitted: 12-14-2011 11:24 Comments (0)

Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun

Submitted: 12-14-2011 11:26 Comments (0)