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thanks dad, for filling my inbox up with fwd e-mails... 
The East Nile virus is apparently not as deadly or notorious?
Oh ! The first page popped up when I typed "childbirth " on Google was "durex"!!!
Everyone is at an uproar over published materials.... " Royal Kate over Closer magazine" , "radicals over a cheesy film", "Me over a stupid how to make money infomercial!"
So did anybody catch X-factor? That BIG BIRD looking chick was singing , more like squacking! guess her future on the line too.
There's plenty of fish in the sea. Build an aquarium...
10-11-12..........Happy I can count past 9 day.....:-)
Hurrican Sandy is mother natures revenge for Jersey Shore.
"Fungry" The State Of Being Hungry.!
Here's to the kisses that I snatched, and Vice versa. Bottoms up fellas.
I blocked Taylor Swift but her songs still play on my radio.
I think about you all day & I can't wait to sleep at night just to see you in the morning. This is how I know our love is real, food.
WHAT? 10 TO 20!?! FOR SELLING HO HO'S ON THE BLACK MARKET!!! ... Whooooa, your honor, there has been a BIG misunderstanding here...
A stupid, ridiculous, sappy, eye-rolling Hallmark commercial just made me tear up...the holidays are officially here.
Have been playing with the first of the snow today! or, well I fell and broke my hip. still counts!
used to go to random weddings back in the day just to put a picture of his junk on every disposable camera.
Let's just eat pizza and cake until nobody loves us.
Almost have my puppy trained to only sh*t in the neighbors yard.
Today is National Book lovers day. No wonder everyone's on Facebook.
This beer just whispered "I want to be inside you" and I was all like "ok dude, but I probably need to get drunk first". 