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NETFLIX Bird Box about an English ladie's privates? 
The cashier asked if I'd like my milk in a bag to whom I replied "No thanks, I think it would be easier to carry home in the container."
No matter how much you shake your peg...... The last drop always goes down your leg.
Did you hear. DEMI LOVATO New song? Sober not Sober
Since 1/20/17 I feel like I'm in the 1988 movie "The Live" and I'm one of the few people with a pair of the sunglasses.
It’s so cute when billionaire philanthropists donate less than 1%. Bless their hearts.
When my mother in-law said she wants to be creamated. I immediatley made her an appointment for next week.
Ice bank mice elf.. say it real fast 10X
When it comes to my omelette cheese I'm Un-American. #whitechesseplease
I just saw a report naming the 20 worst cat food. Mine gets #1. He deserves it that cat bastid.
I want you all to know, I read your post while pooping
Which Knee? the left knee? the right knee?...the weenie?
Lasik surgery is at least $500 to just fix an eye....on wheel of fortune I can buy the I for half that price
if this 2nd stimulus goes through, I want this payment in pennies so I can swim in it like Scrooge McDuck
Confucius say, man who gets high on rock, gets stoned.
Okay. So they can make fake meat out of plants. Try really impressing us and make a watermelon out of a London Broil.
I put the thingamajig in the whatchamacallit and turned doohickey and wuteveritis still doesn't work. Any ideas?
Remember, it’s not actually a coup unless it comes from the coup d'état region of france, otherwise it’s just a sparkling authoritarian takeover.
Can someone please go to MeWe and Parlor and wish them a Merry Christmas.
If women aren’t meant to cook then why do they have milk and eggs inside their bodies 