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A man injured his hand at work. The doctor said sorry but we need to amputate one of your fingers. Man ask the hole finger? Doctor said no, the one next to it. 
Here's a list of my favourite xmas carols.
Shout Out to the Kids in the Projects that left some Milk & Cookies out for Santa but the Roaches got 2 it first.
If you're single, happy go f#ck yourself today. . .
Thanks to the last 8 years, at least the east side has plenty of vacancies!
Someone's overfeeding that damn cat. I mean.. there's something like Stonehenge in her litter box.
Just farted so badly Adam Sandler is pitching to buy the rights to make a movie about it.
Remember, YOU are unique ... just like everyone else.
Reese with her spoon is always ready for cereal.
I never realized how many people I know that cared about Britney Spears's sister...
Its 103 outside an I'm inside watchin tv under my snuggie.. Thanx A/C!
Better to go in one ear and out the other than in one ear and out the mouth.
David Guetta, "all the crazy sh** I did tonight those will be the best memories". So, will they?!
They began filming the new Batman movie here in Pittsburgh. This is going to be great!! In this one, he gets caught by the bad guys and the Gotham Police…Damn road construction!!
no matter how odd the chances are for a villain in a fight, they always show up
MLB looking into Illegal poker games at Oscar Madison's apartment. Felix Unger has no comment.
March 14th the males alternative to Valentines Day... Look it up ladies Saltgrass is sounding good!!!!
What's on my mind? *insert sarcastic third party rant here*
it too late convert Charlie Sheen into a Redsox's fan so they can start winning?
I keep hearing this week is the big 17th anniversary of Kurt Cobain's death. I'm just wondering why we are suddenly celebrating 17th anniversary's like they are significant somehow. Otherwise, shouldn't he wait until 20th or 25th like other dead people?
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