Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   Can anyone help me with some DIY plumbing? I've been looking for a book for beginners by someone called Lee King. Anyone?

   throwin a beat down.

   kicking names and taking asses

   naked twister anyone?

   Googling his Twitter all over your Facebook. ;)

   Michael Jackson requested to be buried at sea…between two buoys.

   better start training for the 2016 olympics.

   She was that excited she slipped off of the chair

   save the whales... Collect the whole set

   Thanksgiving! The time of the year where the bathrooms are the busiest

   's age is very inconsistent, I wouldn't be surprised if it changed again next year.

   When the infidels came and put him down, MuhamedBob turned into a clown, now no afterlife virgin will want to dance with the fool who went and, burned his pants

   just read a sign on the highway that says "Observe Warning signs! State Law". if you don't observe warning signs, you wont see it. Just curious....WHAT IS THE POINT!?!

   amazed by the fact how some symphonies can pull the string of hearts and takes one to totally different environment within seconds and making mood swings followed by lacs of chemical changes occuring in the brain

   just kicked off of public transportation

   Whoever invented calories is gonna get their face f***ed with ice cream cake.. .

   Hopeless you say !!! Nah, don't give up, some people live an entire life on hope....and guess what ?? They living fine.... :)

   Do you go down on the first date?.....oh wait this isn't Zoosk.

   I'm wondering which is worse; the fact i'm is talking to the toaster or the fact that the toaster is talking back

   APATHY ERROR: Don't bother striking any key.