Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   Lets play post office... You lick and I'll deliver.

   What did Curt Cobain say to Courtney Love before he died?... Holes gonna be big!

   Did you know..... your middle toe is a radar detector for chair legs??!

   what does a shingle and a fat chick have in common? They both get nailed by mexicans..

   My three unwritten rules : 1. 2. 3.

   sleeps well with others

   an expert on woman and knows all there is to know about them because he got the best one to marry him :)

   thinks she needs a better drummer...

   I find the upper arm bone humerus

   And just when I saw you ... I realized I had no more money left

   Please put this on your status if you know, or are related to, someone killed on the Death Star. People must understand that the Rebel Alliance is a band of murdering scum. The Empire wants only to bring peace to the galaxy but these rebels continue to ki

   If history repeats itself, I'm totally getting a dinosaur.

   It's been lovely, but I have to scream now.

   So many freaks... so few circuses.

   Can't sleep. Clowns will eat me.

   My 2011 New Years Resolution is to hangout with more than 2 of my facebook friends.

   I listened patiently for you to make a noise but you never did. Reluctantly I had to admit you were right, it was a bottomless pit.

   I keep pictures of all of you in my wallet.

   I wonder if my mailman even recognized me with my clothes on.

   Why were the police ever issued with pepper sprays? Surely this will lead to the creation of more seasoned criminals.