Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   rated MA for a mature audience, he contains coarse language, some nudity and adult themes

   Dating is for suckers who are spending a lot of money and aren't getting any.

   Women don't hit harder. We hit lower.

   Why they play football while there is a Vuvuzela concert?This is Rude

   loves to chase his pets with a vacuum cleaner

   really wonders why if Jimmy cracked corn and nobody cared....why did they write a song about him?

   I never apologize. I'm sorry, but that's just the way I am...

   Italicize words to give your status that gangsta lean.

   Mr. Howell's and Gingers' love child

   Prostate awareness day January 12, 2009---Show your color's guys

   stuck on band aids because band aids stick on me.

   Says Anything you Can Do... I Can Do It Better!!!

   wanted to learn how to make ice-cream, so I started attending sundae school.

   i hear you know how to satisfy your wife in bed, yeah,you leave the room.

   The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that. It's good knowin' he's out there. The Dude. Takin' 'er easy for all us sinners.

   My wife is in the bathroom yelling "could smebody tell this bathroom scale that april's foolsday was last week" nd am thnkng thts scary!

   Make sure your car windows are working properly when you decide to let a big one out.

   I'd be lying if I said I didn't like Nickelback. I'd also be lying if I said I'd be lying if said I didn't like Nickelback.

   What can a lawyer do that a duck can't? Stick it's bill up it's arse.

   I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 5:30 his c**k wakes me up, and it is getting too much.