Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon If you need pills to be a parent then you're not a parent. You're a child yourself.
←Rate | 01-23-2013 08:14 Comments (2)  


   messageicon Whitney Houston died? Does that mean we have to wait nearly 20 years for Justin Bieber to die? Has anyone turned him on to coke yet?
←Rate | 02-12-2012 07:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon ...look daddy!!...the elephant is eating the peanuts right out of my hand!!..back away son, that's no elephant, that's a fat girl.
←Rate | 04-25-2012 11:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Gonorrhea would have been a great name for diarrhea medicine
←Rate | 04-20-2021 03:40 by TeHe Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wonder if I can do a reverse mortgage on my student loan and then when I die they can have my degree.
←Rate | 05-06-2021 07:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon waiting to be blown by Irene ... I wonder if she swallows :)
←Rate | 08-27-2011 15:06 by tmp Comments (0)  


   messageicon like that and that's the way it is
←Rate | 09-24-2008 04:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like to dye my hair when I stay in hotel rooms to make the housekeepers believe I’m on the run.
←Rate | 06-28-2023 10:05 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The "nut job" told the "nut jobs" that the head of the FBI is a "nut job" You can't make this stuff up
←Rate | 05-20-2017 13:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon probably the earliest flyswatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to the end of a long stick.
←Rate | 07-30-2009 00:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon also known as H1N1
←Rate | 09-16-2009 00:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon ..walked into a butchers and saw some meat hanging from the ceiling. The butcher said he'd give me $100 if I i could jump up and touch them. I said "no" and he asked why. I said "Because the steaks are too high."
←Rate | 11-04-2009 19:55 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just found a Christmas present from last year for the kids....... should have seen their little faces when they opened it...poor little kitty!
←Rate | 12-12-2010 15:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Leaving tha house to start todays blactivities!
←Rate | 01-17-2011 12:40 by Skedee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just accepted Jesus...to do my lawn for the next year
←Rate | 02-11-2014 13:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Only trust people who like big butts... they cannot lie.
←Rate | 07-11-2012 19:41 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just took a duce so big and hard I think it was my first gay experience
←Rate | 12-11-2010 20:14 by @daddybullfrog1 Comments (0)  


   messageicon a jack of all trades and a master of fun.
←Rate | 03-31-2009 13:35 by Shreyas Comments (0)  


   messageicon Does anyone have a good marinade recipe for dolphin?
←Rate | 11-20-2010 12:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Look at your status, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine. Sadly, yours isn't mine. But if you stopped posting about other things and made this your status, yours could be like mine;)
←Rate | 09-09-2010 19:19 Comments (0)  



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