Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon it okay to text my kids not to come home cause i'm gonna do their mom? I mean, it is 2013... RIGHT?
←Rate | 09-07-2013 18:40 by Steve OH Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't you just hate it when your friends ask you to flex, then your bicep smashes them in the face knocking them unconscious?
←Rate | 07-19-2012 23:43 by topherjordan Comments (0)  


   messageicon Cap'n crunch without crunch berries doesn't make any sense to me
←Rate | 07-26-2012 22:46 by tmdavies Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can't corner the Dorner.
←Rate | 02-15-2013 10:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Tried putting myself in someone's shoes & now I have a smelly boot stuck on my head!
←Rate | 02-18-2013 13:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I lost my mood ring and now I don’t know how I feel about that.
←Rate | 03-04-2013 16:09 by MG Comments (0)  


   messageicon Great to be Catholic this month! We welcome a new Pope, plus we get three major religious holidays! Palm Sunday, Easter, and to kick it all off...the most important...St. Patrick's Day.
←Rate | 03-14-2013 09:35 by Sammy Comments (0)  


   messageicon You may look physically better than I do, but GRACE is d Reason Why I ALWAYS Get what you wish you had!
←Rate | 04-02-2013 14:17 by @divalasugar Comments (0)  


   messageicon Oh bloody hell! Someone has eaten all of the figgy pudding! ツ
←Rate | 12-25-2012 14:21 by Goober Peas Comments (0)  


   messageicon Our economy would probably be much better if people only spent less time using facebook during work hours!!!
←Rate | 01-03-2013 20:54 by J.D. Comments (0)  


   messageicon being with someone who treats you like dirt really makes you appreciate someone who treats you like a goddess
←Rate | 01-17-2013 23:31 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Loves getting brain so much I should be a zombie!!
←Rate | 05-28-2011 17:34 by Beau Comments (0)  


   messageicon Alone is not bad, remember to be murdered is normally in the company off at least one other person
←Rate | 06-01-2011 08:41 by mhenry Comments (0)  


   messageicon NFL fans are forming their own union and are filing a lawsuit against the NFL. The union will be called the NFL-FU (NFL Fan Union)
←Rate | 03-11-2011 09:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon And on the eighth day God said, "Okay, Murphy, you're in charge!"
←Rate | 03-11-2011 11:15 by Hot Tea Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nothing like being 29 years old and having your Mother threaten to ground you if you get another tattoo. Havent seen her this fired up since I got caught in a dirty chat room on AOL 3.0
←Rate | 03-25-2011 00:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon hanging out with charlie sheen, no explanation needed.
←Rate | 03-25-2011 17:18 by Chelsea Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll take Gary Busey & his nonsensical ramblings over Charlie Sheen & his b.s. any day.
←Rate | 04-03-2011 22:02 by GRRRRLISME Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think I need to buy my husband a box of tampons
←Rate | 04-05-2011 12:13 Comments (0)  


   messageicon TOMORROW...One of the greatest labor saving devices of today
←Rate | 04-10-2011 20:45 Comments (0)  



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