Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon In life you've got to learn to take your time with things. That's why I went to the first grade twice.
←Rate | 06-28-2011 02:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Shutting down the computer and realizing you need it again -_-
←Rate | 07-01-2011 21:34 by @Jordansonmafeet Comments (0)  


   messageicon celebrating the 4th by putting pop-rocks in the vaseline!!
←Rate | 07-04-2011 12:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Let be grateful for the people who make us happy and get rid of the deadwood that makes us sad.
←Rate | 07-17-2011 13:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hoarder is such a bad word.... I Prefer the term "Clutter Junkie"
←Rate | 08-13-2011 23:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fridays are like a metaphor for mullets.....Business during the day, and partying at night!
←Rate | 09-09-2011 10:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Apparently 'Fat Tuesday' doesn't constitue telling fatties they're fatties.
←Rate | 03-08-2011 14:33 by Bill Comments (0)  


   messageicon I would've hated to have been the guy that had to change the light bulbs on The Green Mile......."Really?? Again??"
←Rate | 03-19-2011 00:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon so hardcore I bought 1 newspaper and took 2! now what!
←Rate | 04-06-2011 19:15 by ndiggitydogg! Comments (0)  


   messageicon They passed a budget last nigt and the Fereral Government STILL shutdown today! Oh wait... its Saturday isn't it?
←Rate | 04-09-2011 21:34 by bert Comments (0)  


   messageicon New Rule: If you are currently separated and/or getting divorced you must deleted or at least block your soon to be ex.
←Rate | 04-10-2011 13:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon At what point does Wonder Woman go Google things to know about them instead of only wondering and turn into Know-It-All Woman?
←Rate | 04-15-2011 13:52 by Atropos Comments (0)  


   messageicon The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who, in times of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality.
←Rate | 04-24-2011 13:19 by Unknown Guy Comments (0)  


   messageicon searching Netflix for a movie to watch and found one that's titled after what all the women of my past have said to me... "I Love You, Don't Touch Me!"
←Rate | 05-10-2011 23:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A man posted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted'. Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'
←Rate | 05-13-2011 00:45 by khoperoberts Comments (0)  


   messageicon Never trust the word of a man who wears a wig.
←Rate | 09-12-2011 01:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear sleep, I miss u. Come find me I'll be waiting ;-)
←Rate | 09-12-2011 02:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon This Yorkie is eating up our retirement money. I'm serious. She found the shoebox under the bed.
←Rate | 09-12-2011 20:09 by Rick H. Comments (0)  


   messageicon guess ima get ahead start and get google+ account because facebook drawlin
←Rate | 09-25-2011 17:57 by natemorales Comments (0)  


   messageicon A woman said : "Men are like pennies: two-faced and worthless" I say : "women are like anything that can be bought by those pennies"
←Rate | 10-07-2011 01:15 Comments (0)  



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