Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   Sometimes a lil weed is all you need.

   Its funny how black NFL players sit during the national anthem in protest but would surely shoot another black for a cool pair of sneakers.

   ■When you take an amazing picture you automatically think: “That will be my new profile picture”.

   James Cameron's new movie "Avatar" comes out next week. People say it will be as successful as "Titanic". Not the movie. The ship.

   considering taking out a loan and purchasing a yacht so I can decrease my deficit *Universal Health Care Bill logic*

   might be addicted to eBay considering he just spent 6 hours trying to burn the face of Jesus into his toast.

   Its bad enough humour has dried up around these parts but now we have to resort to r acial humour? Really?

   Let's get married, make babies, argue about money & yell hurtful things at each other while praying for a way out. That's real love baby!

   Lord....Please send ALL the morons below me back to school!!

   Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people "the cops." But you know, sometimes, you've just got no choice; those kids gotta get to school!

   it's funny Obama will negotiate with Iran, but won't negotiate with the his own government.

   Obama has gone from 'Change you can believe in' to 'Can you believe there's no change

   It’s funny how 1 text, 1 song, 1 mistake, 1 lie, 1 truth, and 1 person could change your mood in 1 second.

   congratulations danica patrick and jeff gordon... daytona 500's first all female front row...

   People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.

   Next person that talks politics with me I'm kicking in the crotch. I don't care if they elect a pineapple into office. It's all one big game anyway.

   Some Warning Labels are a little retarded, like on my Deodorant it says, "Avoid Contact with Eyes"....TOO LATE, I've already seen it!!!

   : Every day should be 'HUMP DAY'.... but not the Wednesday kind.

   I absolutely HATE when people put song lyrics as their status! It makes me wanna SHOUT! Kick my heels back and SHOUT! Throw my arms up and SHOUT! Throw my head back and SHOUT!

   What's the difference between men and pigs? Pigs don't turn into men when they drink.