Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon -- Magazine collectors, they have a lot of issues....
←Rate | 03-31-2010 17:01 by Y.P Comments (0)  


   messageicon has decided not to call them BRAs from now on and instead refer to them as BOOBIE TRAPS! coz it just sounds more fun to say
←Rate | 09-08-2010 12:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon gave a pint of blood today... too bad it was at the dentist's office
←Rate | 09-15-2010 23:17 by jables Comments (0)  


   messageicon You ever see a van so creepy it feels like the guy actually said "rape-van" when the car salesman asked him what he was looking for?
←Rate | 09-18-2010 20:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "More fun than a barrel of monkeys." Okay has anyone ever stopped to think how pissed of, if not downright vicious, a barrelful of monkeys would be once released from the barrel?
←Rate | 09-24-2010 06:08 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I finally got my wireless internet to work...this is the best thing to happen to me since the negative pregnancy test...
←Rate | 10-01-2010 01:12 by @Jason_Vasquez Comments (0)  


   messageicon i have no problem sacrificing for friends......... but it is hard to find a virgin and suitable altar
←Rate | 10-20-2010 16:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My transformation into a baby seal is almost complete.
←Rate | 09-14-2012 12:50 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon According to my horoscope, I'm going to get rich today. According to my Youtube comments, I'm a "douche." Life is confusing.
←Rate | 09-21-2012 00:08 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think the cinema should give you an extra "Previews Popcorn" when you buy a "Movie Popcorn"
←Rate | 09-21-2012 21:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Remember when I loved you unconditionally? Well the terms of that arrangement have changed.
←Rate | 10-10-2012 04:24 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Maybe instead of running your mouth you should try jogging a few miles to sweat that hatred out.
←Rate | 10-20-2012 12:36 by Czovczov Comments (0)  


   messageicon How to make a woman go mmmmmmm all nite long? …………………….. with Duct Tape
←Rate | 04-18-2013 18:10 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Titanic is a great lesson of why just the tip can get you in a lot of trouble.
←Rate | 05-15-2013 02:13 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just before I wrecked myself, I had the sense to chickity check myself.
←Rate | 05-19-2013 09:07 by andrew jackson Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm at my sexiest when it's last call and you're pi$$ed at your boyfriend
←Rate | 05-19-2013 11:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why are there jelly donuts but no peanut butter donuts? And why no peanut butter and jelly donuts? And why is my mother an alcoholic?
←Rate | 05-22-2013 04:22 by BigSarge Comments (0)  


   messageicon Squirrels have 4 teeth.... Jealous Tennessee?
←Rate | 05-26-2013 22:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's totally ok to create a Facebook account for your pet, provided you have severe mental retardation.
←Rate | 05-27-2013 12:48 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Roses are red, your body is fine, I know we just met, but your place or mine?
←Rate | 02-14-2013 01:38 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  



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