Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Turns out, “Dress for the job you want," does NOT mean you should show up to a job interview in footie pajamas.
←Rate | 05-03-2012 11:47 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon so does this mean there are no more Kodak moments?
←Rate | 01-19-2012 16:55 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Soul Train has been derailed....RIP....Don Cornelius....
←Rate | 02-01-2012 10:09 by 300 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm finally rich! I have...Silver in my hair, gold in my teeth, crystal in my kidneys, sugar in my blood, lead in my ass, iron in my arteries ans an inexhaustable supply of natural gas!
←Rate | 02-02-2012 16:09 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon I shot the parrot. But I did not kill the parakeet..
←Rate | 02-09-2012 14:21 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have no adult supervision today and there is a peanut butter pie in the fridge...this will not end well.
←Rate | 04-18-2013 08:16 by M Comments (0)  


   messageicon Men! If you don't sleep with them, they never call...if you do sleep with them, they never call. You may as well get a good f**k out of the deal.
←Rate | 05-13-2013 12:32 by Anita Dicken Comments (0)  


   messageicon Remember, Mondays are fine. It's your life that sucks.
←Rate | 05-20-2013 19:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If your relationship has more issues than a magazine stand then I suggest you cancel that subscription
←Rate | 05-22-2013 07:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why are 3 of the 4 judges on America's Got Talent foreigners??
←Rate | 06-19-2013 09:48 Comments (2)  


   messageicon You guys make Facebook worth it! Just kidding, we are all wasting our lives.
←Rate | 06-24-2013 20:27 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I didn't say you were stupid, I said that "i see a pole and body glitter in your future"
←Rate | 07-19-2013 07:18 by equaloppjoker Comments (0)  


   messageicon An apple a day keeps the doctor away? Bull$hitt. Apples are dangerous. Just look at Eve, Snow White, Blackberry or any pig at a luau.
←Rate | 08-15-2013 07:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Carpe Scrotum (grab life by the balls)
←Rate | 09-24-2012 10:39 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Humans are the only creatures on earth that will cut down trees, make paper, then write "SAVE TREES" on them.
←Rate | 11-14-2012 13:42 by Jackoo Comments (0)  


   messageicon The phonetic alphabet for BJ is "Bravo Juliette." Which is exactly what I say to my girlfriend after a blow job....
←Rate | 01-09-2013 13:23 by ballysboots Comments (0)  


   messageicon The state of Washington is looking for a marijuana consultant now that marajuana has been legalized. That must be one of those green jobs president Obama is always talking about.
←Rate | 02-01-2013 19:54 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you're an American who feels that you are represented in your government, please contact me. I love people with imaginations.
←Rate | 07-20-2012 04:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon terrorists are starting to get worried coz Americans have now started to steal their jobs
←Rate | 07-25-2012 04:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon 16 and a Olympian > 16 and Pregnent
←Rate | 08-01-2012 01:56 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  



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