Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |   Oldest   |   Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
Page: 2032 of 5594

   messageicon So, how's that "I wouldn't live anywhere else" thing working out for you New Yorkers?
←Rate | 06-19-2020 09:50 by Anywhere-But-NYC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I call bulls*** on killing someone with kindness... that "kindness" crap won't even maim someone.
←Rate | 04-21-2011 13:36 by @The69Sheriff Comments (0)  


   messageicon just because you're on vacation doesn't give you the right to take a picture of every cocktail or check in at every bar. That falls in the category of, "I could care less"
←Rate | 12-28-2012 16:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon a gift to AMERICA .....President's BIRTH certificate and Bin Laden's DEATH certificate!!
←Rate | 05-02-2011 00:12 by Brian ROSS Comments (0)  


   messageicon hey did you guys hear? The Apprentice was interrupted by some special news report....
←Rate | 05-02-2011 00:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So with all that news last week about the iPhone 4 tracking all kinds of stuff, makes me wonder....did Bin Laden have an iPhone 4?
←Rate | 05-02-2011 09:31 by DaveB1191 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Somewhere, In An Afterlife, Sir Henry Cooper Is Beating Seven Shades  Out Of Osama Bin Laden :)
←Rate | 05-03-2011 13:01 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I still say I heard someone talking from under that sheet when we tossed the body overboard, but whatever. Can't go back in time.
←Rate | 05-04-2011 13:50 Comments (0)  


   messageicon was preparing for Sunday, but I just realized that post-rapture looting makes no sense because so many of us will still be here. Particularly people in public office and law enforcement.... : (
←Rate | 05-17-2011 16:26 by Sully Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Punxsutawney Phil, If you are not frozen, please come out of your little home tomorrow morning with your eyes closed(so you don't see your shadow) and flip everyone off. That should sum up this winter.
←Rate | 02-01-2011 15:50 by acreak Comments (0)  


   messageicon waiting for wolf blitzer to invite the situation to the situation room ....
←Rate | 02-03-2011 16:24 Comments (1)  


   messageicon The uneasy moment when you can't understand someone even though they repeated themselves 5 times.
←Rate | 09-01-2011 12:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon FACEBOOK - helping people get sh*t off their chest since 2007
←Rate | 07-05-2011 15:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When reality kicks in… add more booze.
←Rate | 02-09-2012 13:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You should see the places I've been on my stationary bike
←Rate | 02-13-2012 14:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The tortoise and the hare is a classic fable, but the moral only helps you when racing a guy who takes a nap with a big enough lead.
←Rate | 02-23-2012 06:25 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon When the wife and kids go on vacation, I always keep the neighbors on edge by placing rectangular mounds of dirt throughout the yard.
←Rate | 03-02-2012 10:06 by SEAN Comments (0)  


   messageicon still in a relationship. Cuz I didnt win the mega millions
←Rate | 03-30-2012 23:41 by Vinzgomez Comments (0)  


   messageicon Bubba Watson looks like Latka from the TV show Taxi
←Rate | 04-08-2012 19:24 by Migasjoe Comments (0)  


   messageicon It is impossible to cut a cheese tray without eating the irregular cuts.
←Rate | 04-08-2012 19:40 Comments (0)  



Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left