Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |   Oldest   |   Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
Page: 2022 of 5594

   messageicon will never understand rich people with messed up teeth.
←Rate | 10-24-2010 14:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering if a turtle loses its shell, does that make it homeless or naked?
←Rate | 04-27-2009 09:52 by Troy Bannister | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon trying to remeber what she wasn't supposed to forget :-/
←Rate | 05-08-2009 08:56 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon I looked away to not sneeze on my keyboard, and sneezed on the fan and it went in my face
←Rate | 05-11-2009 05:08 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon was such a Don Juan growing up, the girls Don Juan anything to do with him...
←Rate | 05-13-2009 23:29 by Ron | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon “Now, I don't want to get off on a rant here, but guilt is simply God's way of letting you know that you're having too good a time.”
←Rate | 08-21-2009 04:51 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm just not that into you.....when I'm sober.
←Rate | 06-25-2010 12:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon once blinded someone with science, which, unfortunately, turned out to be an A-class felony.
←Rate | 08-12-2010 11:27 by CS Comments (0)  


   messageicon When is the excessive use of the word 'swagg' going to die already. Getting tired of hearing it in every rap song. Bad enough people don't even know the true meaning of it.
←Rate | 08-19-2010 15:14 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Feds are indicting Clemens for perjury, said they knew he was on steriods when they saw his nose grow
←Rate | 08-19-2010 16:13 by smeebert Comments (0)  


   messageicon Did a Facebook search for childhood friends. Found out they're still people but DID NOT ADD THEM. That's how you use Facebook. For stalking.
←Rate | 08-20-2010 09:55 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dishes done....check.....laundry folded....check.....kids in bed.....check. And my wife says I am emasculated! Maybe I should look it up in the dictionary to see what it really means....
←Rate | 04-12-2010 21:30 by Dave B Comments (0)  


   messageicon the first to the fridge, the first to the couch, and most importantly the first to the remote. What it is to be a true champion......
←Rate | 04-27-2010 23:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon optimist drowns in half full tub
←Rate | 04-29-2010 13:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I open my eyes every morning I pray to God that everyone should have a friend like you.... Why should only I suffer!!!
←Rate | 05-11-2010 16:39 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Starting my new excercise routine- I am tired of looking like I have two sets of breasts.
←Rate | 01-10-2011 11:43 by christineusar Comments (1)  


   messageicon if you think weakness can be turned into strength, I hate to tell you this buddy; but that is another weakness.
←Rate | 01-16-2011 20:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.
←Rate | 02-02-2010 21:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere
←Rate | 02-04-2010 19:55 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Watching NASA TV and the launch prep for STS-120 ... and I am somehow jealous that they get to leave the Earth.
←Rate | 02-07-2010 03:53 Comments (0)  



Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left