Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |   Oldest   |   Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
Page: 1974 of 5594

   messageicon LOVE ~ It's a special kind of stupid.....
←Rate | 03-22-2011 16:11 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon My interest in boomerangs comes and goes.
←Rate | 07-04-2011 16:31 by Aaron Comments (0)  


   messageicon What's the point of the Psychic Hotline if they won't tell me where my other shoe is?!?
←Rate | 07-12-2011 13:12 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon No Facebook, I don't want to have you as my home page. I actually have a life -_-
←Rate | 07-31-2011 18:08 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Osama had porn, Pepsi, Coke, TV, strange drugs, three women and more! Are you sure we killed Osama Bin Laden and not Charlie Sheen?
←Rate | 05-13-2011 18:36 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Now that the world is ending this Saturday, making plans for the weekend will be so much easier
←Rate | 05-16-2011 09:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Two rules of success in life: 1. Always have some secrets. 2.
←Rate | 08-16-2011 05:48 by hoyttwothree Comments (0)  


   messageicon Someone is not a happy camper and should learn to appreciate how those guys are saving you the time to browse through twitter for the best jokes.
←Rate | 12-22-2014 12:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just tried to check my Farmville for the first time in 2 years, apparently I forgot to pay my taxes and the IRS owns it now.
←Rate | 12-27-2014 08:21 by styles Comments (0)  


   messageicon You posted a drunk selfie last night at 2:04 AM and then deleted it five minutes later. But I took a screenshot. Let's negotiate.
←Rate | 01-06-2015 15:09 by StonerDudee Comments (2)  


   messageicon Whenever the brain and the heart fight it's always the liver that suffers.
←Rate | 02-08-2015 20:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You're doable, not dateable. Know your place.
←Rate | 03-20-2015 05:47 by Dude Comments (0)  


   messageicon I started homeschooling my kids and now we're allergic to gluten and don't believe in vaccines.
←Rate | 03-30-2015 11:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A Virginia woman on Tuesday graduated high school at the age of 111. She’s the first person to graduate high school and have her whole life behind her.
←Rate | 06-20-2014 21:30 by Mark M Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whenever I see a piece of gum in a urinal it makes me cringe. I just can't imagine the pain that caused on the way out! And also how does it not come out like silly string?
←Rate | 08-07-2014 15:12 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hit a deer last night. It died instantly. I feel awful, but when I'm jogging I'm in my own world.
←Rate | 09-05-2014 05:51 by andrew jackson Comments (0)  


   messageicon Screaming out "BOOM PREGNANT!" during sex is never as funny as you think it will be.
←Rate | 10-19-2014 18:30 by Bobo the Chimp Comments (0)  


   messageicon ßî†chës be trippin.. OK, I may have pushed a few.
←Rate | 03-02-2014 11:24 by Askhole Comments (0)  


   messageicon Happy 15th birthday google, 3 more years and you will be able to search for adult sites legally
←Rate | 09-27-2013 08:50 by Zack Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm sorry I keep looking at your chest while you're talking. It's just so beautiful. What is it, oak?
←Rate | 09-29-2013 21:59 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  



Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left