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Just once I would like to hear a rapper say that he is pretty average with the rhymes. 
Insecurity is an ugly thing, it makes you hate people that you don't even know...
You cannot have a Zen garden with the little rake and sand if you also have a cat. Trust me.
heading out early to siphon gas from my neighbors......
Facebook is like school. There's the cool kids, the intellectual rebels, and there's always a rumor going on.
Alcohol doesn't cause Hangovers...Waking up does...
It's not really such an "Easy-Bake" oven when you're trying to cook a pot roast. This is taking *forever*.
I enjoy long romantic walks to the fridge.
I Absolutely hate when my touch screen touches things I had no intention of touching.
What I love most about my ex is that she is someone else's problem now.
It's up to you to find the beauty in the ugliest day.
My parents told me I couldn't be a pirate when I grew up. My movie and music collection says otherwise.
Sometimes I wish I was like my calendar, it always has dates.
I so want to be in a relationship. I want to account for everything I do. Answer to someone when I come home late. And get dragged over the coals for not calling a hundred times a day.
You ever have one those great days where everything is going right? F#ck You.
I hate it when you look in a car window to fix ur hair.. after standing there for 5 minutes... you see someone in the car...
There are some days when I just really do not want to wake up early and go to work. I call these days Monday - Friday.
You don't have to be naked to have a good time, but it helps.
I almost sh!t myself when my friend told me that the government has access to a database that tells them everything about you, and even where you are on a daily basis. He said: It's called Facebook or something.
My girlfriend says she's going to leave me for being too impatient. I can't wait. 