Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Prefers the days when bustin' a cap was followed by a puff smoke and putting a new red roll in.
←Rate | 11-19-2010 21:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Michael Jordan Brand Condoms - They make sure you score." Sold at your nearest Jordan Brand Supplier.
←Rate | 11-19-2010 21:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Girl you must have restless leg syndrome because you can't seem to keep those legs closed!!
←Rate | 11-19-2010 20:54 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I love you! And that's ok that you don't, because sometimes the beauty is in the attempt
←Rate | 11-19-2010 19:56 by BFC Comments (0)  


   messageicon So I was just thinking, if fans of the Grateful dead are called deadheads, hulk hogan's fans are hulkamaniacs, those that mean Harry Potter fans are Potheads?
←Rate | 11-19-2010 19:56 by Mr. Gasparilla Comments (0)  


   messageicon If first dates are interviews, then second dates are negotiatons.
←Rate | 11-19-2010 19:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon 3 Pints of Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream, a wrench, and handcuffs made out of Twizzlers. I'm ready for bootycall Friday night to begin!
←Rate | 11-19-2010 19:37 by sms Comments (0)  


   messageicon One good thing about snow is it makes your lawn look as good as your neighbors
←Rate | 11-19-2010 19:31 Comments (4)  


   messageicon I'm not a chef. But I'd be happy to baste your turkey for you.
←Rate | 11-19-2010 19:19 Comments (2)  


   messageicon I can't believe that guy in the Heineken commercial stole my wedding reception move!!
←Rate | 11-19-2010 19:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Mexico can never get an Olympic team together... anybody who can run, swim or jump is already in the States.
←Rate | 11-19-2010 18:55 by The Mexican Comments (0)  


   messageicon Q:Why do you want to be a flight attendant? A:So I can be high all day.  
←Rate | 11-19-2010 18:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I be the internet moves quite fast between midnight and 3am. All the Potter geeks will be at the movies rather than searching for online "secrets".
←Rate | 11-19-2010 18:40 Comments (2)  


   messageicon Worried about traveling on Turkey Day, the full body scan screener may think I have a rilfe in my pants.
←Rate | 11-19-2010 18:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I felt like an escaped hostage after finally getting off the phone with this long winded guy...do
←Rate | 11-19-2010 18:03 by mhenry Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's amazing how many Catholic priests have left the church to pursue careers with the TSA...
←Rate | 11-19-2010 17:38 by Demon Comments (0)  


   messageicon theres only one way to become champion ......... never loose
←Rate | 11-19-2010 17:23 Comments (6)  


   messageicon you can't tune a piano, but you can tune a fish
←Rate | 11-19-2010 17:16 Comments (1)  


   messageicon I just bought the Complete Idiot's Guide to saving money for only $89.99!
←Rate | 11-19-2010 17:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hold my Nintendo gun sideways when I'm playing Duck Hunt cause I'm a Gangsta!
←Rate | 11-19-2010 16:58 by jimbo Comments (0)  



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