Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
Page: 3949 of 5594

   messageicon There are two types of women - one with perfect make-up, great hair, sexy clothing, fresh nail polish, and incredible shoes . . . and one with kids!
←Rate | 02-01-2012 19:12 by migasjoe Comments (0)  


   messageicon See even Don Cornelius is sick of Black History month.
←Rate | 02-01-2012 18:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What's the difference between pick and choose? Pick is when you make a decision about something & Choose is what Puerto Rican women wear on their feet!
←Rate | 02-01-2012 18:27 by Dice Comments (0)  


   messageicon Please don't BRO me, I am a single child and I'm white.
←Rate | 02-01-2012 18:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon almost had a psychic girlfriend but she dumped me before we ever met
←Rate | 02-01-2012 17:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon 's son bought a Justin Beiber CD. I wonder which Powerpuff girl he will dress as for Carnival
←Rate | 02-01-2012 17:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon brought to you today by next door's unsecured wireless router
←Rate | 02-01-2012 17:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon going to write a report about procrastination for university tomorrow.
←Rate | 02-01-2012 17:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon your fat.......... and I'm not going to sugar coat it cause you would prolly eat that also.
←Rate | 02-01-2012 17:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Welcome to Facebook! Where liars tell more lies, enemies are Facebook friends, weak people turn into Facebook gangsters, haters complain about haters and every person who talks about money ain't got none.
←Rate | 02-01-2012 17:13 by Tsparks Comments (0)  


   messageicon Finding a teen that does not have child is like finding the back to my remote
←Rate | 02-01-2012 16:04 by Jon Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll be completely honest with you... sometimes I shower naked.
←Rate | 02-01-2012 15:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll buy the magic mushrooms, fireballs and flying raccoons but a Princess dating an Italian plumber?
←Rate | 02-01-2012 15:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm really bad at measuring the correct amount of pasta, so if you and 79 of your friends want spaghetti tonight, come over
←Rate | 02-01-2012 15:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So when a girl Poke$ me on fb, is it like a $trap on or something?
←Rate | 02-01-2012 14:42 by Dorito Bandito Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll call you Daddy......no problem, when I get a weekly allowance!
←Rate | 02-01-2012 14:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today is "International Microphone Testing day" 1.2.12
←Rate | 02-01-2012 14:08 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Soul Train? I don't think this means what you think it means!
←Rate | 02-01-2012 14:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon decorating for my stupid sisters baby shower using condoms as balloons..
←Rate | 02-01-2012 13:58 by jeneralee Comments (0)  


   messageicon likes to fist-bump with a 'i got ur nose' fist
←Rate | 02-01-2012 13:30 by Tazor Comments (0)  



Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left