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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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When a woman says she likes stamina in a guy, she means over the course of years -- not hours.
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10-08-2012 13:09
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facebook is alot like that shi tty car you wanna get rid of because of all up keep and changing of parts but you keep it because it saves gas.
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10-08-2012 12:58 by
bfinest
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What do you get when you put 50 lawyers in a room with 50 lesbians? One hundred c*nts who don't do c*ck.
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10-08-2012 12:02 by
@zubindalal1
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My ex-girlfriend walked past me today and didn't even notice I was there. I must be getting better at this stalking business.
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10-08-2012 11:43 by
@zubindalal1
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Who else thought the ad for the new World of Warcraft game was a preview for a new kick ass Kung-Fu Panda movie?
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10-08-2012 11:19 by
DonDeeX
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They took cigarette ads of TV because it was bad for our nation's health. Sooo....why can't they do the same for political ads?
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10-08-2012 10:27 by
Danmanz
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I wonder if Chinese tourists get upset when they buy a souvenir from America and find out it was made in China.
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10-08-2012 09:15
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I know it's hard to believe but one year ago today, it was Oct. 8th...
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10-08-2012 09:08 by
Steve OH
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You're hot, wet, extremely satisfying. You always put a smile on my face and you're the first thing I want in my mouth when I wake up. Ahhhh COFFEE!
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10-08-2012 06:48
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Why are the Mexicans the only people with the Cojones to name their kid's Jesus?
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10-08-2012 06:30
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soccer is way more fun to watch when you pretend the ref really wants to play but is too scared to touch the ball
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10-08-2012 06:29
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Sometimes I don't know whether I want a girlfriend...or a sandwich.
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10-08-2012 06:28
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The first time I saw you, I thought to myself, "Is that for me?"
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10-08-2012 06:24
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A girl plays with your mind, A woman explores it.
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10-08-2012 02:39 by
equaloppjoker
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My wife called me a child. I told her, be careful who you're calling a child because if I'm a child, that makes you a pedophile. And I'll be damned if I'm gonna sit here and get lectured by a pervert.
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10-08-2012 02:37 by
Frostie
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Stop letting people who do so little for you control so much of your minde. Feelings and emotions.
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10-07-2012 23:34 by
BEGO
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Sometimes I laugh so hard that tears run down my leg!
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10-07-2012 23:13 by
equaloppjoker
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This recurring dream where my FB account gets deleted and I cease to exist.
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10-07-2012 22:24 by
equaloppjoker
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watches Sunday football with you all day... Wife that girl.
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10-07-2012 22:06 by
BEGO
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I was thinking earlier, thats all, just wanted everyone to know that it does happen from time to time........
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10-07-2012 21:16 by
MWC
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