Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   I need ten well behaved cats and ten cat sized business suits.

   Those who say sex is not everything are usually not good at it anyways.

   One poll out this morning declares Bidens Dentist was the winner in last nights debate

   What kinda shoe do pedoophiles wear? White vans.

   Understanding is what allows someone like me to tolerate someone like you.

   Magic Mike...50 Shades of Grey...I knew I should have bought stock in Duracell this year.

   10-11-12... Sooo Exciting... Not!!. I think we all know, the BIG day we're all really waiting for is in seventy days and counting... Be afraid. Be very afraid! Brohahaha!!.

   hipsters: being uncool on purpose since 1979...don't believe me? I heard it on vinyl...

   That Mark Walberg must be a funny MF... He sure had Regis Philbin smiling up a storm on Antiques Roadshow tonight...

   my wife said I drink too much and don't exercise enough. So I stole her pedometer. Half mile so far from the living room to the fridge!

   if we'd had female candidates there'd be a big ol' cat fight right about now!!

   Hollister should offer complimentary gas masks and ear plugs when you walk in the store

   Paul Ryan looks like Doug, Dougie, Doug, Doug from "The Hangover"

   BIDEN'S laugh is scaring me... and the inner boy within me keeps screaming "I need an adult."

   Thursday Night Football on the same time during the Vice Presidential debate....well played NFL, well played.

   Gee, that's a nice set of legs, what time do they open?

   anyone else watching this verbal pay-per-view match? the folks on tv call it a "debate"

   wanting to know what you would do for a Klondike Bar?

   7 things I look for in a girl: Beautiful Intelligent Gentle Thoughtful Innocent Trustworthy Sensible. ;)

   just sitting here with my hand in the cookie jar :)