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They praise and call Brice brave for changing into a woman. They hail it as an achievement. This world has really gone to the dogs. I remember a time when bravery was risking your life fighting against the Nazi. Achievement was landing on the moon. 
We now return to PAWN STARS: How much can I get for this genuine 100 dollar bill.... The best I can do is $25..... Thinks for 5 minutes.... Deal
The Grateful Dead are putting out an 80-disc live performance box set. No word yet on which Grateful Dead song it will be....
meets girl for coffee* *sets down blueprints for bank* "What's this?" Your dating profile said you were looking for a partner in crime..
Coffee so bitter it blocked me on Facebook.
According to my Timehop, I drank a lot on this day in 2014, 2013, 2012, 2011...
National Running Day was a success. Ran to the fridge then back to the couch. Whew! I'm exhausted.
Coffee so black it drop out of high school
If Timehop is good for one thing, it's to remind me that I peaked a few years ago...
Coffe so black it wants to start looting.
"OMG, Have you heard the news?" "Yeah, they totally carried Huey Louis"
Keep calm and watch me put all of your "Keep Calm" shirts in bleach.
Your girlfriend could be dumb as anything but the minute you start arguing with her she'll turn into a lawyer with a degree from Cambridge
Sad how some stick figures get stuck working the hangman game, while others get to have nice families on the back of SUVs
Remember when there was nothing to check and no device to check it on and all you did was live your life?
A cute thing I tell my kids is that Jurassic Park was an actual documentary shot when I was a kid and it's all true.
Sex so good your neighbours made you a sandwich
Of course I have a drinking problem, it cost too much.
Well, basically you just touch her down there" - Getting To Third Base Coach
It's crazy that your brain can calculate where to put your hand to catch a 98 mph fastball... But won't keep your mouth shut when a woman is angry 