Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   when vehicles start running on water, the world would be at Peace...

   I just read an article where a study found that men who reported incomes higher than $250,000 on a dating site, received 156% more emails than the under $50,000 ones. On a related note, my income is now $250,000. Your move ladies.....

   SAVE ELECTRICITY; You wouldn't like someone to turn you on & then just leave

   Not everyone that comes into your life needs to stay there.

   Just got through watching ''Black Swan".Thought it was a movie about nature turned out to be a softcore Porno.

   Lost his teddy bear.. Will you sleep with me?

   bind people should hook up with burn victims, not only do looks not matter, they may be interesting reading too

   shopping for a butler monkey on craigslist

   walmart should just start selling furnished trailer homes already. cha ching

   Why are so many people obese these days? Because burgers are$.99 and salads are $4.99

   why can they put enamel in paint but not on your teeth?

   This woman at Walmart has a lovely set of March Madness teeth.. She's down to the final 4.

   would it kill em to put a freakin superball in the lucky charms box?

   i hope you're happy people..y'all jus sued your way into no cracker jack toy.. if your kid choked thats called natural selection, not have a retard an be a millionairre

   just wore tampon applicaters as earrings in the mall and no one noticed.

   I'm trying to be healthy and grow my own food but I can't find any Twinkie seeds. :/

   i really wish they would start selling buckets of bacon at the movies. popcorn is getting old.

   Corned beef and cabbage. Proof that drunk people really will eat anything.

   if your gonna have a hairy chest at least shave a Superman 'S' in it

   If god did not want us to eat animals he would not have made them out of meat!