Trump Filter: ON | OFF
Search Messages:
I just threw a D battery through my neighbor's window because he played 2 Sublime songs in a row. 
This infomercial salesman just screamed that the phones are going crazy, so I immediately threw mine across the room and sheltered in place.
TIP! Never wear a Santa hat with a jingle bell at the tip when trying to secretly jerk off in the women's bathroom stalls.
I wish Adele would get dumped again so she can make some new music.
I scrape my knees to feel. - emo kindergartner
Man, this wall is high. My back is owie. - Spiderman at 37
God gave me the ability to pee and brush my teeth at the same time. I'm like the Tim Tebow of he bathroom.
Geez, how many pigs do I have to kill to get the term "hamicide" to catch on.
She says her heart belongs to Jesus but she is half naked in most of her profile pics. Ho put some clothes on before you put your name in the same sentence with Jesus.
You know my name, not my story. You've heard what I've done, not what I've been through. So stop judging me.
When I was 5 I used to be a paedophile but I guess I grew out of it.
Every town has a "pink" house. Really, what the hell is up with that?!?
I love how people fight via facebook when their in relationships... Why even bother changing the relationship status to single.. When you know you ass is guna change it back in 15mins! Do us all a favor an STFU!
Out of the many defining moments in a mans life, few are as significant as winning a game of NBA Jam.
im going to send in a video of me dodging a spider web as my audition tape for the next Matrix movie
What do you call a woman who talks and wants to cuddle after sex? ......A taxi.
Good Lord that song " Red Solo Cup' is the dumbest song ever. I would have to kick my on a** if I wrote that song
If Penn State Offers You A "Full Ride" Scholarship...I Would Read The Details First.
It is what It is, I am who I am,believe it or not... I don't give a damn!
Would you rather date a woman with a beautiful body covered in tattoos, or a nicely decorated trash bag?
Site Links
© 1999 - 2021 Tjshome.com
