Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   If my computer had a neck id punch it in the neck!

   to the person who wrote they dont want 2 B reminded of 911 cuz it was a horrifuc day,well so is your birthday ! JERK !

   Got my heart broken recently...makes me wanna crack their skull....afterall fair is fair....right?

   Don't sweat it when an Anonomous Cyber Bully says something insulting or points out your blunders online. Fact is that most of us could eat a can of Alphabet Soup and sh!t better responses than their posts which is what they hide from in the 1st place.

   I'm not surprised when I see some poor coward insult me online anonomously. What's surprising is that he could pull himself away from his Post T Vac and his new episode of "Toddlers and Tiaras" long enough to type something intelligible.

   Some say motivation doesn't last, but so is bathing. That is why I recommend it daily.

   What do I say to some poor schmuck who tells me he can out insult me on line? Nothing. I have a hard time talking while laughing hysterically.

   Some people don't fall in love; they drown in it.

   Referring back to one of my earlier posts I'm pretty sure I could eat a couple of bowls of Alpha-Bits Cereal and poop out better Rap Lyrics than what's in most Soulja Boy Rap Songs.

   That annoying feeling you get when you're dying to talk to someone, but your pride won't allow you to text them first.

   God made you and me, then he whispered, "Meant to be''

   I just heard Alicia Silverstone had a son and named it Bear Blu. Now I wonder if it's mere coincidence that she starred in Clueless.

   Politicians should be made to wear NASCAR suits so we can tell who their sponsors are.

   Having sex with someone who doesn't love you is like having sex with a cactus; it will leave you hurt and devastated.

   A real woman avoids drama like a plague, for she knows her efforts and time are too precious and to be wasted on little minded people and their tantrums.

   Roger Ebert called. He's giving your online performance of "The Worlds Biggest A$$hole" two enthusiastic thumbs up. Way up.

   Yesterday I went to see a shrink about my Facebook addiction, everything was going smoothly and I was on the road to recovery until he asked me, What's on your mind?

   They say it gets easier with time, but I guess when you let someone really special go, you'll spend the rest of your life just missing them.

   Living life through a recession; Got cereal, no milk. Got ham, no bread. Got love but no lover. Got juice but no gin.

   WESTBORO BAPTIST'S: Military Funeral Protesters who'll one day bring their glowing personalities and heartwarming words to the Nether-Regions they'll share with other sincere folks like Hitler, Dahmer, Gacy, and Jack the Ripper.