Joser Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon you know what works better than a rape whistle? a rape pistol.
←Rate | 05-12-2010 13:54 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon If a transvesite goes missing, would youu put their face on a carton of Half and Half?
←Rate | 04-06-2010 05:08 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon Work like you don't have proof of citizenship, Love like you were on a reality TV show, and dance like you were being thrown 100 dollar bills at
←Rate | 04-22-2010 17:37 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon mixd whiskey with water and got drunk... mixed brandy with water and got drunk... I mixed scotch with water and got drunk again... therefore I've reached the conclusion that water is bad for me...
←Rate | 04-30-2010 01:23 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon LIFE INSURANCE: a contract that keeps you poor so you can die rich
←Rate | 04-15-2010 23:22 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon You ever wonder why wearing no underwear is called "going commando"? It seems to me it wouldn't be useful in a combat situation.
←Rate | 05-19-2010 16:50 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes, when I feel optimistic about the future of mankind, I go read the comments on YouTube and it brings me right back to reality.
←Rate | 07-12-2010 11:39 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon The propeller is just a big fan in the front of the plane to keep the pilot cool. Want proof? Make it stop; then watch the pilot break out into a sweat.
←Rate | 07-15-2010 17:39 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.
←Rate | 04-23-2010 19:03 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon 1f you c4n r34d th1s you r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d
←Rate | 03-23-2010 19:54 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon No man goes before his time....... Unless the boss leaves early...
←Rate | 04-22-2010 19:19 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon KFC is donating money towards breast cancer. They don't want anything killing their customers except heart disease.
←Rate | 05-04-2010 17:39 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon Well established facts can be disputed if you Google them hard enough.
←Rate | 05-19-2010 16:50 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon Drinking, smoking and fatty foods are taking too long to kill me. I had to fall in love again to speed-up the process.
←Rate | 04-15-2010 23:18 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon So excited: my DVD collection of "Hoarders" is almost complete! And on VHS! Also on Blu-ray and 8mm film. And LaserDisc. Where is my cat?
←Rate | 07-08-2010 17:39 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wish there was a "I liked your Facebook status until every one of your moron friends had to comment on it
←Rate | 07-15-2010 19:19 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't be humble. You're not that great...
←Rate | 04-27-2010 02:32 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll tell ya, there's nothing better than a cold beer(s) after a long hard day of laying on the couch...
←Rate | 05-23-2010 22:15 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm no a lawyer, but I'm pretty sure "He started it," is a legit defense.
←Rate | 05-07-2010 12:38 by Joser Comments (0)  


   messageicon The smaller the dog, the crazier the chick.
←Rate | 07-12-2010 11:34 by Joser Comments (0)  




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