Baddie Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon To all the mothers: Happy Mother's Day. Don't let it go to your head. You are a working double tomorrow.
←Rate | 05-13-2012 12:12 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can't believe Mary's parents bought that whole "pregnant virgin" thing.
←Rate | 05-13-2012 11:48 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon "You don't have to send your mother anything today, we already paid her enough." - Gay dad
←Rate | 05-13-2012 09:58 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Vegetarians, your boyfriends want to break up with you.
←Rate | 05-13-2012 09:50 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kristen Stewart seems like one of those missing milk carton kids who was raised by their kidnapper.
←Rate | 05-13-2012 09:42 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm sure I have annoying habits as well but lately my wife is doing this thing where she ages.
←Rate | 05-13-2012 09:38 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon That woman's husband on the cover of TIME looks awfully young.
←Rate | 05-13-2012 09:12 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Boy, pregnant women don't like to be called "b!tches" at ALL!
←Rate | 05-13-2012 09:07 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ellen DeGeneres would make an amazing Crocodile Dundee.
←Rate | 05-13-2012 08:55 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Husband during anniversary dinner, "I love you so much, let's go do it in the alley. I'll give you $30."
←Rate | 05-13-2012 02:22 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I always keep a bottle of champagne and a large cigar under my side of the bed............. Just in case the wife stops breathing.
←Rate | 05-12-2012 10:05 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Mayweather is a Legend. Its just a shame he practices on his girlfriend and kids.
←Rate | 05-06-2012 11:56 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Never treat a slut like a girlfriend, let some other dumb guys do that.
←Rate | 05-06-2012 11:49 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon How bad must the rest of the sperm be if the one with Downs Syndrome wins the race?
←Rate | 05-04-2012 15:28 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Women always say they can do whatever a man can do. I bet they can't tuck their balls between their legs.
←Rate | 05-03-2012 14:03 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon The most common phrase in China: "Hey! You look familiar!"
←Rate | 05-02-2012 15:34 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Suicide is never the answer. Unless the question is, "What should Justin Bieber's next career move be?"
←Rate | 05-02-2012 13:49 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guys, it is true. Size DOES matter. When have you ever been satisfied after she brings you a small sandwich?
←Rate | 04-30-2012 15:37 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon My girlfriend said we can't hang out this weekend because she doesn't exist.
←Rate | 04-30-2012 13:41 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I saw a monarch butterfly today, what made it so special is the fact that it was the first time it wasn't stamped on some stripper's ass.
←Rate | 04-27-2012 12:29 by Baddie Comments (0)  




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