K-Mac Funny Status Messages
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Wow, I'm so high I can see my house from here.
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05-27-2012 20:53 by K-Mac
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Finally, that rare and elusive Monday we like.
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05-28-2012 07:46 by K-Mac
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When a Mormon knocks on your door to tell you the "good word" you don't answer....why the hell would you want one to lead your country?
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06-01-2012 09:29 by K-Mac
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Got these new jeans made by children in a sweat shop. A friend asked, "Ed Hardys?" "No, Fed Hardlys".
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06-02-2012 14:04 by K-Mac
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We're getting so obese, they've added new plus sizes.....Huge....Gigantic and Oh my God, it's coming our way.
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06-02-2012 20:53 by K-Mac
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Don't need to worry about zombies here in West Virginia....no brains.
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06-02-2012 20:55 by K-Mac
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VelVeeta....the expensive government cheese.
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06-03-2012 19:03 by K-Mac
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The experts says "don't stare directly into the sun during the Venus transit". Do we really need to be told that? Also, during the Venus transit, don't forget to breathe.
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06-05-2012 09:22 by K-Mac
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Before Facebook and online dating, I seriously don't think I've ever seen a picture of a person in their bathroom.
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06-08-2012 21:23 by K-Mac
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The only time I wouldn't mind being buried alive is if were under a pile of money.
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06-10-2012 07:32 by K-Mac
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I think before we vote, we should get the politicians drunk. That way they would speak what's REALLY on their minds.
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06-10-2012 12:43 by K-Mac
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If we can't get weed legalized, we can just start calling it smokable beer.
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06-14-2012 07:00 by K-Mac
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I got caught talking to myself today, so to avoid embarrassment, I pretended to be a tree until they left.
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06-16-2012 12:51 by K-Mac
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Still no Fathers Day card from my kids. Just because they are short, furry and talk funny is no excuse....it's hard being a single father.
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06-17-2012 08:13 by K-Mac
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It's Friday, Yay the weekends here...<BLINK> Monday? WTF?
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06-18-2012 07:09 by K-Mac
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Duct tape: Turning NO!, NO!, NO! into mmm, mmm, mmm.
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06-25-2012 22:13 by K-Mac
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You're laughing because I'm laughing, but I'm laughing because I farted.
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06-29-2012 12:05 by K-Mac
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Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes getting a divorce...Now it's Katies turn to jump up and down on Oprah's couch.
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06-29-2012 15:07 by K-Mac
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I think we should celebrate Canada Day be giving Bieber back.
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07-01-2012 21:32 by K-Mac
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Ever notice that after you and some friends order a pizza the only conversation you have is "where the hell is the pizza?"
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07-02-2012 15:16 by K-Mac
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