Eddy Funny Status Messages

   Agree or disagree with the Trump protesters....he got more people walking in 1 day than Michelle Obama did in 8 years

   my yard is so white it got nominated for an Academy Award

   I wake up feeling like a golden statue....everyone else is the pigeons

   my new years resolution is 1680 x 1050

   when couples get married they should be required to each give up 1 sock & put them together to make a pair of socks....later on if they divorce they get their sock back. "Master has given me a sock. I am free"

   I wish I was Santa...he knows where the naught women live

   It's so cold now, when I turn on Netflix I call it "Netflix & get chilled"

   it's the time of year agian to get a lot of fruit cakes...now I cant wait for them to leave & go back to their own homes

   if you burn the turkey, just tell the family they're eating blackbird

   Pence should consider himself lucky....worse has happened with presidents at theaters

   will Hurricane Matthew be followed by hurricanes Mark, Luke & John?

   the USPS should make stamps of Donald Trump just so everyone can say "I have a 'Trump Stamp' "

   I think an eye doctor should run for president in 2020 with the slogan "a perfect vision"

   i find it odd that there's never a yelp review for the yelp website

   where's the CTRL, ALT and DELETE buttons on life?

   Am I the only person wondering why Bernie Sanders never joined the military to someday be a colonel?

   the "check engine" light came on. I checked & the car definitely has one. It makes loud noises & drips some stuff all over the place so I know it's there

   just like the calendar says, I "SAT" around all day today

   am I the only person watching Fuller House waiting for Bob Saget to tell the daughters how he met their mother?

   I find it ironic that Valentines Day is abbreviated as VD