Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 6323 of 6370
I can feel guilty about the past, apprehensive about the future, but only in the present can I act!
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06-29-2009 13:43
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counting it down..only 54749 days until Bernie Madoff gets out of Jail.
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06-29-2009 13:39 by Vybe
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they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
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06-29-2009 12:46
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just discovered that in Wingdings 2, the letters "M" and "J" are a white glove and a black hand. Michael Jackson conspiracy theory number 1...
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06-29-2009 08:06 by Duncan
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says the show must go on...please move on...enough of michael jackson in my news feed...
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06-28-2009 21:34
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"another Celebrity just went KABOOM!". Will tell you who it is for just $19.95, here's how to order.
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06-28-2009 15:13 by Rychefan
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says if silence is golden, then no more Billy Mays is priceless.
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06-28-2009 15:10
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ate 3.14159265358979323846ths of a pi
I'm not opinionated, you're just always wrong!
wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger. Then it hit
taking life with a pinch of Salt...with a slice of lemon...and a shot of Tequlia!!!
thinks a clean house is the sign of a broken computer.
doesn't suffer from insanity... he enjoys every minute of it.
if my calculations are correct SLINKY + ESCALATOR = EVERLASTING FUN
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
doesn't use no double negatives.
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06-28-2009 02:57 by Jed
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answers Bob Dylan's question: "How many roads must a man walk down before they call him a man?" The answer is 14! Now get a job you freaking hippie!!!
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06-27-2009 12:24
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"Shut up facebook.I'm trying to do my homework,"
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06-27-2009 05:05 by Payal
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Well in happier news....Abe Vigoda is still alive!!
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06-26-2009 23:36
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Imagine if the Amish had Facebook and played Mafia wars it would go sumtin like this ...."You were attacked by Don Yoder he has beaten you with A hoe, 3 horse n buggies, 6 bonnets, 3 aprons and a goat taking 1 energy and built you a chair!!!!!"
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06-26-2009 22:46
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